Os meum es pace; Ne desperes; Non est consilium

Friday, January 17, 2020; 2347

I figured by the time I finish writing this it will actually be Saturday. So, why not do my daily dilly and get it done. 

Actually, it may not take all that long. There really wasn’t much to the day. It’s been an odd day…

WALT: And Prime. 

*hangs head, shaking it.* Dude, I just don’t know about you. 

WALT: Aw, come on. That was good. 

*sigh.* Folks, I’m just going to let you sit with that one. 

WALT: You are a wicked, wicked man. 

You started it. Hey, speaking of starting things...you have started quite a trend. 

WALT: Whaddya mean?

Ok. So, every so often, Looch will make some sort of a random Walt reference. I think he likes you. 

WALT: Yeah, I’m kinda sweet on him, too. 

Okay. I don’t need to hear any of this. 

WALT: It’s alright. I’m just trying to butter him up for tickets. The season’s starting soon you know. 

And, I’m a wicked man?

WALT: Admit it. It’s slick. You wish you could be as slick as me.

Sick?

WALT: Slick.

Sick?

WALT: Nevermind...jerk. 

Only on my good days.

WALT: Go on...Looch is whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

No. I mean, yes...but...no. Stop it. 

Anyway, so Looch is just cool like that. He likes to get creative and have fun. But...today...someone else made a random Walt comment. 

I was texting back and forth with my friend about the brake changing. I had to show him a picture of the clamp I had. He sent back a message that read, “how big is that, it looks huge, don’t say it Walter,” with a little stern angry face behind it. 

WALT: He called me Walter.

He did.

WALT: Is he related to Two-Balls over here?

Oh my god. You’re just not going to let that go are you?

WALT: Nope. Never. I am never letting go of his two balls…

JOHNNY: Gentlemen, can we please…

Seriously, man. Do you even need to show up? That’s all you say. We can copy and paste that shizzle in here. 

JOHNNY: I am a Junior Executive Producer. It is not my job to talk. If I am talking, you are doing something wrong. 

Funny. I’m surprised you don’t talk more. 

WALT: Junior, huh? Junior Two-Balls.

JOHNNY: Walter!

WALT: Two-Balls!!

JOHNNY: Walter!!!

WALT: Two-Balls...and a cane. 

Alright, now. Enough. Geez, you know it’s bad when I have to pull the plug on the shenanigans. Anyway, the point to all of that is that it seems you are quite popular among the Travelers.

WALT: Did you doubt this? I told you, man, I’m cuddly and loveable. 

Dude, I don’t know if there is enough liquor in existence to get me to consider you cuddly and loveable. 

WALT: That’s ok. I have roofies. 

Oh good lord what is wrong with you?

WALT: You have me up working at midnight. That’s what’s wrong with me. I’m a bit salty.

Maybe you should change your diet. 

WALT: That’s what she said. 

JOHNNY: Gentle-MEN…

*WALT and FREEDOM together* Puh-lease!!

DOC: You know...I should have brought some of ze popped corn.

Okay that’s enough out of the peanut gallery. Before I go on, and lord forgive me, since you brought it up...did you ever find that video to share?

WALT: Not yet. 

Could you please? Then maybe people will know what you’re talking about instead of just thinking you’re some kinky freak. 

WALT: Well, I am. 

I realize this. But, we don’t need everyone thinking it. 

WALT: As long as the ladies think it. 

*shaking head and sighs* Oh god. Can we please?

JOHNNY: Yes, seriously, can we please? Time is money and Reverend you don’t have any of either. 

Fair enough. 

Okay. So there wasn’t really much to the day. Most of my efforts focused on taking care of the brakes. I reached out to everyone I could think of for guidance and assistance. I even posted on social media. Some one did come along and take me to pick up the pads. I did make the attempt to change them. Unfortunately, I couldn’t quite get the bolts to budge. So, I am going to try again tomorrow [weather dependent] or air for help to arrive. Overall, it looks like it may not happen until Sunday which could interfere with seeing the girls. However, they have off of school on Monday. So, as long as the work can get done by the end of Sunday there is still hope. 

That was the bulk of my day really. I piddled and dabbled a little bit here and there but not too terribly much. There was some time spent hanging out with ‘Jim’ and helping him with a little project. But, all in all, it was a mellow day. 

In some ways I feel awkward, almost guilty, about this. I think that I should be doing more and pushing harder. But, I feel like I need to slow down and take it moment by moment. This is all typical of The Cycle. I go, go, go. Them I crash and I burn. Typically, when I recover, I go, go, go again. I haven’t really been able to do that this time around. 

There has been such an ebb & flow of activity lately. All types of activities. It comes in waves - Just Enough to get a job done, but with plenty of down time in between. I make the most that I can of that time. But, lately, I am moving slower on all levels. I have to remind myself, often, that I am still in the early stages of healing and recovery. 

I think we often underestimate the affects of shock and trauma to the bodies. Our bodies, on all levels, react immediately to those situations. Some systems activate or speed up. Some systems slow or shut down. My doctor and I had had this conversation once when I was having back issues. I had been sleeping a lot more than usual and he remarked that sleep is a defense mechanism for pain. The mind puts itself to rest. 

If I look back on the past several weeks, it seems I have been through a lot of shock and trauma on all levels. 

Mentally and emotionally I was dealing with my life and everything that was going wrong or disappointing me. This was also impacting me on a deep spiritual level. 

I put my bodies through turmoil when I adjusted my cycles to do The Distributor. Then I shocked them with the heights. [I really wish you could know how much my body was shaking at the end of all of that.] 

I put a drill bit into my hand. I told The Putter and The Professor the other day that I truly think that was the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life. I can still see the moment happen. I can see my prescription shift as the bit bore into my palm and my brain immediately went into defensive mode. 

All of this led to severe depression. 

This all took place in a little over a month, with the worst of it coming in the last three weeks of that time. 

I am literally still putting myself back together. 

If that isn’t enough, I have been going through some sort of Spiritual...I don’t know...uplifting. Now, you may think that is a good thing, and it is. But there is balance in the All of Nature. So, thought the energies are beautiful, they are intense. So are the experiences. I have been having visions and perceptions like never before. Again, I am not upset about this or worried by it nor afraid of it. It is just very different and my bodies are adjusting. 

The messages have, for some time now, all been about slowing down and taking it moment by moment. This has been my mission since the beginning of our current experiment. 

Before I conclude, there is one last bit to my day. 

So, as I have mentioned, Wisconsin is going through some stuff lately - both physically and spiritually. It’s been quite a thing and she has pretty much been on bed rest. She has also been on some serious medication. So, I worry. I sent her a text this evening to check in and see how she was doing. An hour later, I would receive a response. Three separate messages:

“Rose”

“Dolphin”

“Run”

Needless to say, I was quite confused. “Huh???”

“Just turn left”

“What are you talking about,” was my next question. 

The response to that was, again, three individual messages. Each was in Latin. Each was very precise and appropriate to my current life circumstances. I called her immediately after that. I woke her up. She had been sleep-texting me. 

By the way...she doesn’t know Latin. 

Until tomorrow, Fellow Travelers...Peace and Blessings.