Here, There, and Everywhere

Hey, gang! Welcome to my life – where anything is possible and nothing is as it seems. I’m Freedom and I’ll be your host, coming at you from within the depths of Geistopia.

DOC: Velcum To My Life ees a prochect, un experiment in Life unt ART. A living storyboard, if you will. Its premise ees zat life ees experiential, unt zat you can, unt do, experience ze life you choose. It ees based on Ze Veel of Life unt Ze ARTs for Ze New Millennium as life building tools. Ja, it’s true!

WALT: Welcome to my Life is an I T.V. Studios/Geist…House Players Production, in association with the Center for Creative Inspirationalism. JustUs Productions, the parent company, would like to give a ‘Shout-Out’ to the following for their ongoing, and oft-times unknowing, inspiration and support:

Princess Cuddlebug

Princess Sunshine

Craze & Co.

The Shaman

The Pillar

F’n Bob

The Warden

The Entire Putt-Putt-Putter Clan

FaeriePrincess

Professor Siggy Chong

Sparky Wentz-eclaus

The VanMan and General Ralph Glossop (may they R.I.P.)

The Messengers of The Galactic Federation

The Looch

The Bassett Hound

The Baker of the Cornbread

Andy Pandy

Zason

St. Diane & You

Brother John

Spooky Queen

Senoll #5

The Wix-ians

The Socialite

The Village of Idiots

Piz-Niffer

Dancing Queen

Downtown Encyclopedia Brown

Dick Pointer

The Legendary Pink Elephants

Baby-Mama Rabbit

Belle

The Witch Baby

Aaaand, of course, a very generous sponsor who (not-so-much) wishes to remain anonymous.

It is…Sunday, March 21, Two-Thousand and Twenty-Fun. Time...Aligning.

The Post

I don’t have an understanding of this past week. I couldn’t quite find its vibe. Like the whole of my life, it was very much In-Between. I worked, but ended up with some extra time off. I had some productivity in other areas of my life but not quite enough to pick up the ball and start running yet. I got caught up a bit with the bills and even spoiled myself a little. [That was strange.]

Still, I feel restless. I feel as if I am not quite getting enough done. I am feeling the need for…something more. Perhaps it is Post-Quest Depression. A form of withdrawal. Out on the road it is such a rush…such a high. Then, you return to the mundane and try so hard to find your place once more. [G-d, haven’t I done that time and time again.]

On Monday I worked until 1400 then I did not start again until 1400 on Tuesday. Time off like that tends to blend into itself. One day becomes the other. So, one of those days I managed to get my Federal taxes done. My state is on hold at the moment. My app is telling me that I owe the state $600. I’m not convinced yet that that is accurate. I have owed the state before but only like $20-$30. So, that is on hold until I can get a chance to look at it closer and determine a solution…or April 15th – whichever comes first.

Somewhere in time, I managed to sneak by The Cave for just a moment or two and scope out just what kind of a project this is going to be. It is going to be a project. However, I was able to steal time on Saturday to go over and get a start on it. It is going to be challenging and slow moving for a bit, but with a little bit of discipline and focus *wink, wink* it can get done.

Wednesday was my long day.

I’m not sure what happened on Thursday. I worked in the morning and after that I just have no recollection, to be honest. The same is true of Friday. I was supposed to work a double on Friday but over lunch one of the other servers was complaining about too many people being on. So I volunteered to not come in That was accepted. Yes, I lost out on a bit of money but I needed to step back and I’m glad I did. Having Friday open up the way it did allowed me to piddle and do random little things or nothing at all. This freed up time on Saturday.

Saturday I woke and headed for the laundromat first. After that I headed to the mall. I had decided earlier in the week that it was time for a real massage. So, I was going to invest the $60 in myself and get one. First, I walked the entire mall twice looking for a second massage place. I found the one directly on the way in, but I was certain there was another one somewhere. After all, I just had a 20 minute massage not too long ago. So, I looked and I looked until someone told me there was only one. That’s when I realized I had had that massage out on the road.

That was a fun little laughing moment for me.

So, I went in to get my massage. I am glad I had asked for 50 minutes. It took quite a while for everything to relax enough for my mind to relax. Thoughts just kept coming and coming – one thing to the next. At one point, I found myself thinking that I may ask for another 40 minutes and just go to $100 for the massage. I was very tight and very much in need of what was happening. The next thing I know, someone is working on my feet at the same time the man was working on my back. I thought this was interesting because I was having trouble deciding between a massage and reflexology. Soon the man asked if I liked the foot work and if I wanted to continue with it. If I did, it would be $100. [Well, what do you know about that.] So, all in all, I spent $120 on that massage work. [Including tips.]

I usually do not spend money on myself. Certainly not that kind of money on that kind of thing. So, I am suffering the In-Betweens on the matter. I am glad I did it. I absolutely needed it. Terribly. But, I feel a twinge of guilt spending that kind of money. Nonetheless, I felt incredible afterwards. I was light – physically and spiritually. There was a spring in my step. I think this is something I am going to try to do regularly.

When I was all done, I headed to The Cave. Little by little I sorted and organized. One box at a time. I looked through them to make sure they were what they said they were. If they said anything at all. If not, I labeled them.

I have accumulated a good amount of metal again. I left myself some when I went out on the road and I came back to even more waiting. The Putter is cleaning house [and workshop] and so I am getting a lot of the spillover. I have cans and aluminum and steel and silver and copper. I started sorting it, but I have a long way to go and even more to pick up. This is good. I just have to keep it in check and under control until things shift a little more.

The Cave leaves me in The In-Betweens. It is so strange going there. I have no place there anymore and yet I still feel so ‘at home.’ It always feels good to be on the property at Olde Geistopia. I try to enjoy the energies without getting too attached to them since I will have to leave them again anyway.

It is also strange because here I have my life. The whole of my life all crammed into one little building. I am glad it is there and that I still have it all, but at the same time, it is just sitting there almost going to waste.

Yet, the contents of The Cave shift and grow every week. I am accumulating more stuff. Some of it is metal. I have gotten some tools. And, I have received a lot of miscellaneous Knick-knacks. They are all unique, one of a kinds. They are irreplaceable and it is an honour to have received them. But, for all I know they will remain in boxes instead of shelves where they belong. I even have access to a couple more chairs if I would want them.

I look around The Cave and I see my life but it is almost lifeless. The metal, right now, is the only active and sustainable part of it all. Yet, I also see that I am gathering and accumulating. I say again, I have everything I need to at least start in a home. Large or small, I have what I need to function from the outset. It is a hodge-lodge. It is random. It is far from ideal, but I am storing a home in The Cave.

[How long do I store it before I give it up?]

Like I said, I got caught up on some bills. The car payment is up to date and waiting for it’s next withdrawal. The same can be said for the insurance payment. These are my two highest bills each month, followed closely [in timing and amount] by my phone. Everything else is so very manageable. So, I have a foundation started again and I need to just keep building upon it. I have other things to straighten out such as support and the debt from getting The Vantasm fixed in Mississippi. I did receive the stimulus but it is getting soaked up quickly, especially with the upcoming garage appointment. It is one more week until The Vantasm goes in for the steering fluid. I am also getting one of the two outlets replaced. This will help greatly with gas because then I will not have to run the engine to keep my phone charged.

I am getting $851 back in taxes. However, $700 of that is already claimed. I have a long-standing debt that has weighed me down for some time and I would like to get it settled. It will make me feel better as a person…and a parent.

So, I do have monies floating about – coming in and going out. I can’t speak on anything to definitely because it ebbs and flows and changes every day.

My schedule is shifting at The Diner. This is a good thing, though it has happened abruptly and with some tension. I let the kid know earlier this week that I would soon need to go down to 5 days. I said nothing about the doubles only that I need two days off each wee. I told him that I would do one more week [this coming week] at 6 days but after that I need the 5.

He gave me the 5 this week and played with the schedule a bit. Instead of two doubles I have my regular Wednesday double and then a 9 hour shift instead of the split 9 or 10 hours. He also gave me off on Sunday, which is the busiest morning. This goes me the whole weekend off. I’ll take it. I’m no longer worried about what shifts I work or what kind of money is to be made on those shifts. I am no longer attached to what tables I get or when. [They have a distinction in the seating and picking up process. It is frustrating…but no longer.] The shift in hours actually goes me longer stretches of time with which to work. On Fridays I would normally go in between 7 and 9. Then I would be done at 2 and come back at 4 and work until 8. Now I just work 11-8. That gives me anywhere from 5-7 hours after I wake up until I have to be at work. I can get a lot accomplished in that time. Plus with Saturday and Sunday off I can make use of those days to work at The Cave or maybe get some other business things under control.

Like I said, there was tension this week at The Diner. It started last Friday night when in my tired and irritated state I laid into the one cook. I don’t feel bad about it. I wasn’t wrong – just overly irritable. Plus, as I pointed out to him, we take lip from him all day long. I am one person saying something to him once. Still, it left some lingering tension even when I returned on Sunday morning.

I found myself extra tense as well. Once again, the seating was all messed up. I watched as they filled the entire restaurant in rotation, leaving all 5 of my tables empty. Then…they sat ALL 5 of my tables. I was not very happy about this. And, naturally, that is how my day would contine. 2 more full cycles of that. I made decent money but I also gave shotty service at times. Plus, I ran more than I should have had to. Monday was without incident. The kid wasn’t there. Tuesday I would let him know about the 5 days as well as telling him that I m not going to be available for Easter morning. I am taking The Princesses to breakfast, as per their request.

Tuesday night was slower than usual. I came out of the dining room at one point and the other server from the dining room says, “You can go after that table.”

“Oh?”

“We had a huddle. You weren’t part of it. But, you can go.”

“Ok. Do the bosses know?”

“[Mama] was a part of the huddle.”

So, I finished my table, did the side work I was asked to do and cashed out, handing over my slips and saying, “See you tomorrow” to Mama. I was sitting in The Vantasm just a bit when my phone rang. It was the kid.

“Did you tell anyone you were leaving. You have to tell people. You can’t just leave.”

I told him what I was told and that I did my side work, etc, etc.

“Well, I asked around and nobody knew anything. You can’t just leave.”

Then it happened.

“And were you in the register tonight.”

“Yes.”

“For what?”

“To cash out a check.”

“Well, no more. Only on Wednesdays.”

They taught me to run the register so that I can host on Wednesdays so The Old Man and Mama can have off. I wanted no part of any of this but agreed to do it temporarily to help him out. For two weeks I have been jumping on the register to help out when he or his mom aren’t around. Granted in this particular instance I was cashing out my own check, but still, it’s all the same. I didn’t even take my 50% off. I paid full price for the pie I wanted. No one was around to take the money. I figured, what difference does it make. A check is a check. Does it matter if it’s mine?

Not that he knew it was mine, but he insisted…only on Wednesday’s.

I cannot even begin to tell you the umber of issues I am having with this whole conversation and its implications. Somehow, somewhere along the way, I lost his trust and confidence. I do not know how. Maybe the cook on Friday night. Maybe my pissy attitude on Sunday as I was getting my ass handed to me three times over. Maybe it is the change in my scheduling availability. Maybe it was just that I couldn’t run anymore errands for him after last Monday.

I do not know.

But, it got me to thinking on Wednesday morning. What if I go in here and this doesn’t work out? [Because words were most definitely going to be spoken.] So what would I do?

Then I realized, I would do what I always do. I would pick myself up and move on. I would most likely walk out the door, bust out my apps and find whatever work I could that day. I would continue to do that each day until I got it all figured out again. Find a job. Finally start doing the delivery driving. Whatever the case may be, I would pick myself up and move right on. With the stimulus money in place and the cash I have on hand I would have some lead way in generating income so I could just increase day by day until the deed is done.

So, on Wednesday, I went in and told the kid that I needed him to figure out what his recent problem with me is and how to communicate it to me in such a way that we can deal with it and move on because the attitude I am done with.

Those were my exact words.

He didn’t mean to offend me…Yadadada-Yadadada, etc, blah, blah, on and on.

Ok, whatever. We’ll move on.

There haven’t been any problem since then. But, it still isn’t smooth yet. That may just be though. I am truly offended at the register thing. Either he trusts me with the money or he doesn’t. I don’t care if he doesn’t because I didn’t wanna touch it in the first place. But he can’t trust me only when he needs me. I’m not gonna sit well with that at all.

There is still a sense of something in the air…and, I still can’t put my finger on it. It would be nice if it weren’t there, or I couldn’t sense it, or the shifts would just happen already. Feeling it come and not seeing it happen is making me antsy and restless. Sometimes I think maybe it has happened and I just don’t know it yet.

I see a good week ahead. Like I said, I work until 1400 tomorrow be then have 24 hours before I have to be back. But, then I have a good 48 hours with my focus primarily on work. 1400-2100 on Tuesday. My split 0800-2000 on Wednesday and 0700-1400 on Thursday. So, its kind of a trade off. Then I have the nice gap before work on Friday. After work on Friday I have the weekend off and I cannot work until 1400 on Monday because of the garage. I am most anxious to see what that time frame brings.

I am still working with the 3-Weeks marker. It ends that Monday or Tuesday. I still have not seen anything drastic or amazing happen through this. So far, it seems that my original interpretation stands correct. I will find myself caught up and balanced with bills. I will be ready to start branching out and diversifying my work and income. I will have a more balanced schedule at The Diner. Still, there is one more week. Only time can tell.

However, I have also been given a 3-Month marker which would take us right up to about Midsummer. Speaking of the Holi-Days, I had not realized that yesterday was Ostara. I always observe it on the 21st so I don’t really think about it. Imagine my chagrin whenImagine my delight when, late in the day after so many things had happened, I learned what was happening. Turns out, it was t Perfect Day Of. [Funny how that happens all on its own.]

I’m ready…for whatever comes next. I have learned so much in my time. I have forgotten much as well. I have succeeded and I have failed at some of the most important matters. But, I am still here. [Despite any of my attempts to remedy that.]

I know who I am because I have seen who I am not. [More than I care to admit.]

I have spent over two decades on a Quest of Spirit. I have held fast to eh belief that G-d always provides. Very often I have made choices and decisions that were rooted in this belief. Take what is given and make the most of it. Sometimes this has worked out for me and sometimes it has not. Sometimes it was me dropping the ball in some way on some level and others The Universe just had other thoughts.

But, I have lived. I have learned. And, I have grown.

I have prospered in riches – immeasurable and indescribable.

It took many people putting their foot up my ass to get me to see that no matter what life has thrown at me one thing has always been true – I live, I thrive, and I survive.

I need to hold my faith just a bit longer. Both G-d and I know who I am and what I must do and what I must have to be at my fullest. Some of it does rest on my shoulders, this is true. But, oh so much of it rests in his hands.

If you’re not already there, go to the Welcome to my Life Facebook page – WTML. Or the YouTube channel – WelcomeToMyLife08. You can also find me on Facebook under Rev. Matt.

Wherever you are and whenever you are – Like, Comment, and Share – we’re on a Journey and it takes you to get there.

So, without hesitation… for now and for always, from here in Geistopia, this is your beloved Rev…

WALT: And Walt…

DOC: Unt Doc…

JOHNNY: Aaaaand Johnny…

And those guys, saying, “Stay Tuned-In, Fellow Travelers,” and wishing you Peace, Love, Light…

WALT: And Freakishness, Baby.

The Totems & Archetypes

**from Ted Andrews’ Animal Speak**

None mentioned this week. [That doesn’t mean they weren’t there.]