Yule Never Cease

Hey, gang! Welcome to my life – where anything is possible and nothing is as it seems. I’m Freedom and I’ll be your host, coming at you from within the depths of Geistopia. 

DOC: Velcum To My Life ees a prochect, un experiment in Life unt ART. A living storyboard, if you will. Its premise ees zat life ees experiential, unt zat you can, unt do, experience ze life you choose. It ees based on Ze Veel of Life unt Ze ARTs for Ze New Millennium as life building tools. Ja, it’s true! 

WALT: Welcome to my Life is a Geist…House Players Production, in association with the Center for Creative Inspirationalism. JustUs Productions, the parent company, would like to give a ‘Shout-Out’ to the following for their ongoing, and oft-times unknowing, inspiration and support:

Princess Cuddlebug

Princess Sunshine

Company

The Shaman

The Pillar

F’n Bob

The Entire Putt-Putt-Putter Clan

The Warden

FaeriePrincess

Professor Siggy Chong

Sparky Wentz-eclaus

The VanMan and General Ralph Glossop, and Craze (may they R.I.P.)

The Messengers of The Galactic Federation

 Looch

BJ & The Bull

Ace

Bert-On

The Baker of the Cornbread

Andy Pandy

The Mudder

Wilson

Zason

St. Diane & You (5)

Brother John & Sister Jen

The Bee Man

Spooky Queen

Boom-Boom Snuffbox

The Nameless One

Tim-Bo

The Mayor & The Turkey Man

The Rox

PDT

Sir Richard Slouch

The Wix-ians

The Socialite

The Village of Idiots

Piz-Niffer

Dancing Queen

Downtown Encyclopedia Brown

Chicken Witch

Dick Pointer

Soup, the Son

The Legendary Pink Elephants

Baby-Mama Rabbit

Wisconsin Belle

The Babes

Aaaand, of course, a very generous sponsor who (not-so-much) wishes to remain anonymous.

It is…Sunday, December 28, Two-Thousand and Twenty-More. Time...Escalating.

Theme – You Always Have What You Need

 This experience has demonstrated that notion since the start. Sometimes it is in silly little ways. Such as dishwasher pods. We are running the dishwasher constantly right now because I cant wash dishes. I don't generally run the dishwasher. I'm not a fan. So, I don't tend to keep an abundance of pods. It just so happens that a few weeks before the stroke, we had a communication gap in grocery shopping and we both bought pods. At the time, it left us with enough pods for several months. Now, we have what we need. Many times it happens on a larger scale - like finances. As much as I may stress and calculate, the truth is, through this process any money I have truly needed at any point I have had. Every time I think of something we need - somehow, some way, we end up with it. Another is cords/chargers for my phone. With my limitations, I set about trying to have power access everywhere I spend time - without having to move cords and plugs. Again, it just so happens that, for other reasons, I had ordered a set of cords prior to the stroke. So I had those. What I found I was lacking was plugs. When I acknowledged this Cuddlebug came home from a Christmas function with extra plugs. I not only covered the few places I wanted to, I have extras. The bonus is you can plug at least 2 devices into each one.

Lesson – There's Always a Bright Side

 I don't care for what my life is at the moment. It's frustrating. But I find it is also liberating. It sucks not being able to function at my normal level. But the situation has sort of forced me to enjoy my life and my home - to find appreciation for both. I was always on the run so much, in such a RUT-ine [instead of routine,] that I couldn't really catch the groove of it all. I really do love this home. It is right for me at the moment. I've also got plenty of time to take care of all the projects that have been piling up, some for a year. For instance, the kitchen faucet needs some attention, or organizing the little closet. [I've already done some kitchen cabinets and the storage area.] I am getting to do the same thing with myself - cleaning out and reorganizing Mind, Body & Spirit. The stress and uncertainty of things sucks, but I am being allowed [afforded if you will] the opportunity to live and be - not just exist. I will take it...for now.

Observation – Slow & Steady

 Everything. Right now that is how everything needs to be handled. I know I’ve mentioned it before, but it just keeps resonating with me. Everything in my life is working that way at the moment. It’s all very slow - slow healing, slow moving, slow resolutions. All is steady as well. Thins are happening consistently. There are always small shifts here and there. But, again, slow and steady is how I must live my life. I have to keep working at things -- and with no rush. Everything takes time. All I have is time. Getting through all of the administrative stuff is one step at a time and each step seems to leads to another unexpected step. There is no quick resolution to anything. My healing will take time. But I must also take my time with it. When I walk, I must walk slow & steady. It is what keeps me walking correctly. Otherwise, I start to drag my left foot, not take strong steps with either leg. Slow & Steady is why I challenge my hand/arm in some way every day. The recovery of my hand is going to be a slow process. Sometimes, I can o things. Sometimes I cannot. Sometimes I can do things which I couldn't do the day before and sometimes the opposite is true. But I must constantly and consistently try. [Steady.]

The Post

 'Twas three nights after Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even the militant mouse

Though empty stockings hung by the chimney with care, one had to wonder if St. Nicholas had been there.

This may have been one of the most intense weeks I have lived in quite some time. Life was already the chaos of pushing to get things done. The Holi-day this week multiplied that exponentially [it seems.] And I can feel it in my body, too.

As I've said before, Right This Moment, my life is a constant flow of administrative duties - phone calls, paperwork, managing the incoming donations and other funds, applications that need to be re-applicated. It seems as though there is some sort of shift or change - some new bump in the road - every day or two. The Chaos of this has been compacted by the fact that my life on paper and in files has been disorganized and chaotic itself.

The papers and files have been part of a different phase of activity. I have been pushing hard to break through the chaos of bringing the homestead up to a functioning and productive level. This has been challenged on 3 fronts.

First, I was already a bit disorganized and chaotic. Before the stroke there was an ever growing list of To-Dos. Second, my level and ability of functioning is askew, handicapped if you will. I cannot function the same as I did before. My range of motion as a whole is limited. I have almost no grip in my left hand and practically no muscle tension/control in the arm and hand. I fatigue easier and quicker. I have had to find ways to work to minimize the strain and places to rest that can still foster productivity as well as bring comfort and release. For instance, I hat to create an end table space, lamp and all, next to my chair in the main room. It is the most comfort I can get in a day without laying in my bed. But I still need to be able to things when I sit there.

So, there has been a host of projects. Some like the end table. Many were more 'office' oriented - going through and organizing papers, managing the filing system, updating the paperwork "holding." [Where things go while awaiting attention.]

Finally, it seems Cuddlebug has a different attitude and approach to keeping up with the house than I do. I knew this but it was very evident when I came home after being in the hospital for three weeks. It's not that she's a slob or anything like that. I just have a very high standard for things. Admittedly, probably too high. A certain portion of that is caused by the attitude Big 'D' had towards Olde Geistopia for most of my life. It was always "cluttered and a mess." [Even though it generally wasn't so much.] Some of it is my own deep OCD. I just need things to be orderly. [It's that Double Virgo in me. And it is always battling with the Leo that I am.] Still, quite a bit of it is simply a play to the ideas of Feng Shui and other Metaphysical Principles.

Create the life you want. If your space is cluttered you will feel cluttered. If your space is organized and functional so, too, will you be.

This is something most people don't think about much and something Cuddlebug has not allowed herself to experience since she's here. A good example is dishes. I can't stand dishes in the sink. Cuddlebug will just keep piling them in there. The Kitchen is the heart of The Homestead. It controls the pulse and flow of the house. It is the center of activity. Who wants that to be cluttered and weighed down? Also, the sink is one of the first things a person notices coming through our door. That's not the vibe you want to give a guest.

Along the way I have been organizing cabinets and storage areas as well. All things on that previous list of To-Dos.

I have had the added chaos of trying to rebuild some kind of a life while also changing much of it along the way. Stroke is all about our resistance to change. So, I am not only trying to eliminate bad habits - like cigarettes - but I am also trying to replace those with better habits, all the while adding some of my own. I am re-creating my life and my routines.

All of this has been challenging and strenuous enough. The Holi-Day just made it so much more intense. It just added so many layers. The Princesses had started decorating but I had to finish up with lights, the tree, and one or two other things,. None of which was easy with one good hand. It took me a lot longer to do everything. It also gave me a deeper appreciation for my dad. He had only one good hand all my life and it never stopped him from doing things - like incredible light displays or intricately decorating a tree.

Then I had presents to wrap, four batches of cookie dough [Cuddlebug did the baking,] house cleaning and a dinner to prepare. Somehow, we pulled it all off and everything came together beautifully. Both of the girls were a really big help.

We did our presents Christmas Eve morning. We had a successful dinner with The Company and The King.

Christmas Day was a little different for me this year. Usually I spend the day in solitude - cleaning up and putting the world right again, relaxing, meditating. This year, Big 'D' had invited me to Olde Geistopia for the family dinner. It has to be a decade since I attended any family gathering like this.

It was neither terrible nor unbearable. To say my familial relationships are strained would be an understated euphemism. They are practically non-existant, for longer than the previously mentioned decade. But everyone was cordial and polite - at times even loving.

I'm glad I went.

The issue was that I was limited in transportation. I could only get there when Cuddlebug could drop me off which was 0900 on her way to Mama's for breakfast. And I could only leave when someone could drive me home, which was several hours after the 1400 dinner had concluded. So I was there for the whole day and quite wiped out when I got home.

Thursday became my Christmas day. There was plenty of clean up to be done.

Friday things started to return to normal. There was a therapy appointment, new paperwork and avenues to pursue. I even had a spur of the moment Tarot Client.

Yesterday, I continued my organizational efforts by focusing on the storage area in the basement. This was mostly so we can easily put away Christmas. While I was down there I also worked on my laundry.

Today, I piddled around, but the primary focus was getting to and concentrating on this blog. I took the time to clear everything from my to-do list and set a whole groove for it. It's been a very long time since writing felt this good.

Financially, my week was intriguing - as always. At the start of the week, I wasn't 100% sure how things would play out. I knew Cuddlebug had committed to paying the December electric bill as well as a full week's rent [with the agreement that I will pay that back some time when I can.]

EBT seems to be covering our groceries at this point. We don't need much right now because we did that heavy stock up 2 weeks ago. Plus, I have leftovers out the wazoo. Not to mention the ingredients to make myself some meals from my left over ham. It has become an annual thing to use the Christmas ham to make a batch of ham and bean soup as well as some ham, string beans and potatoes. Nonetheless, there are always random things we need. I placed a small order for delivery yesterday. There was no tip added nor an option to add one. [maybe because it was such a small order?] So, the total was all covered by EBT. And Cuddlebug used it to get some things at the store today. I know there's plenty of money left on the card and a decent amount being deposited for January. So food is covered.

We have used about 3/8 of a tank of oil since they filled it last. We have a little over $200 left on the assistance payment [I think.] That's about half of a full tank. Big 'D' seems committed to helping with wood pellets. Heat is covered.

I received $50 in a card from an old friend. I put that towrds Cuddlebug's rent payment.

Of course the reading paid. In fact, it paid and I was paid for a second for his girlfriend when she wants it. The client is a dear friend and he took the opportunity to make a substantial donation to my cause. First, he gave me 2 $100 gift cards. I topok those and assigned them. The first I gave to Cuddlebug for a run to The Club Store. I will be needing a case of soda. Plus, we need paper towels, toilet paper, AAA batteries, and maybe even tissues. All the things that are inevitably needed but I cringe everytime I have to buy them because its such a chunk of money at once. [Of course, it saves me quite a bit of money long term.] So we will use the card and I dson't have to worry about from which funds I will take. Whatever is covered is still covered.

I did a similar thing with the second card - but from a more personal standpoint. Much like cash, a gift card is difficult for mt to get full or proper use. The funds are limited. They will cover what they cover. I may find myself short, or, worse, with some menial leftovers which I could never really use - especially with my current homebound status. So, I decided to use it to get some things I've wanted for convenience and comfort but have put off due to funding.

I ordered a bluetooth keyboard to use with my phone. I have one but it no longer works. Typing takes me a lil longer with only one hand. My desk chair is only comfortable for so long. This way, I can take wiork with me to my chair or, eventually, down to the couch. I can be comfortable - offering my body some relief - and productive at the same time.

I also ordered a Roku device. The cheapest one I could find. For 2 years, I have been carrying the TV and its accompanying streaming device, back and forth between the main room and my bedroom. Needless to say, I cannot do that right now. Cuddlebug is using her friend's smartTV while it is being stored here. The TV that was in her room found its way to mine. Only it doesn't have any streaming. I don't want to deal with the hassle of moving the device back and forth. Also, the device we have in the main room cannot use Hulu. So, I will put the Roku [with Hulu] in the main room and the Air TV mini in my room. That TV does not have a remote. So I ordered one of those as well.

Foolish? Perhaps. Nonetheless, they are things that will add some comfort and ease to my life during this awkward and unfortunate time. And, I was able to get them without harming any of the funds that have been earmarked. In fact, there is some money left on the card. It is already on the Amazon account. So I might just keep it for just that. I know I will need other things that I won't want to spend funds on - such as sage smudges.

He also gave me $500 cash. $400 immediately came out and I paid another wee4k's rent with it today. $20 I used to buy me and Cuddlebug's BF [or, Pico de Beefcake] some BK for dinner. The other $80 is in a holding pattern, but probably also going to some comforts to help ease my pain a bit.

Everything else still stands as it was. With what the Princesses have agreed to cover January bills are till taken care of. And, thanks to a new $100 GoFundMe donation, there is a little over $100 left to cover miscellaneous expenses like grocery delivery tips [if needed.]

My biggest challenge is still the rent. Little by little I chip away at it. Right This Moment, I still need 2-3 weeks ($800-1200) to be current. And I need a total of 7 weeks ($2800) to cover through the end of January. However, today Brother John told me today not to stress it too much. "As long as I'm getting by, you're getting by." Not that he is telling me not to worry at all about it. He just doesn't want me over stressing, nor overextending, myself.

I had a hard time with Yule this year. I just wasn't able to get in tune with the vibe, the spirit, the magick. If you know me at all, then you know this is tragic. For over 2 decades, Yule has been a very powerful, magickal, and inspiring part of my year. I pretty much live my year to get to it. It is always filled with such spirit and magick, and, of course...gifts. It's really kind of an experiential thing.

The gifts are not always to me but from me. They are not always materialistic. They can be lessons, Experiences, Moments shared. They are generally unexpected - except for the ones I am told about in advance. [Usually crafted items.] The whole thing has become sort of a game between myself and The Old Man of the North.

I believe in The Yultide Spirit no different than I believe in G-d, angels, or any other spiritual being.

That being said, I feel as though this Yule has been a test of that faith. All of the challenges in getting it all done in time, my struggles in feeling the Spirit, the deviation from my regular Christmas. To me, that all adds up to 'test.' I've been navigating through it all and so far I am satisfied and content in my experience. But, there are still 3 more days. [4 if you count The Day After.]

If you’re not already there, go to the Welcome to my Life Facebook page – WTML. Or the YouTube channel – WelcomeToMyLife08. You can also find me on Facebook under Rev. Matt.

Wherever you are and whenever you are – Like, Comment, and Share – we’re on a Journey and it takes you to get there.

So, without hesitation, for now and for always, from here in Geistopia, this is your beloved Rev…

WALT: And Walt…

DOC:  Unt Doc…

JOHNNY: Aaaaand Johnny…

And those guys, saying, “Stay Tuned-In, Fellow Travelers,” and wishing you Peace, Love, Light…

WALT: And Freakishness, Baby.

The Totems & Archetypes

from Ted Andrews’ Animal Speak

Snake

Deer

(Snow) Goose