Flip-Flop [And, Ya Don't Stop]

Hey, gang! Welcome to my life – where anything is possible and nothing is as it seems. I’m Freedom and I’ll be your host, coming at you from within the depths of Geistopia.

DOC: Velcum To My Life ees a prochect, un experiment in Life unt ART. A living storyboard, if you will. Its premise ees zat life ees experiential, unt zat you can, unt do, experience ze life you choose. It ees based on Ze Veel of Life unt Ze ARTs for Ze New Millennium as life building tools. Yeah, it’s true.

WALT: Welcome to my Life is an I T.V. Studios/Geist…House Players Production, in association with the Center for Creative Inspirationalism. JustUs Productions, the parent company, would like to give a ‘Shout-Out’ to the following for their ongoing, and oft-times unknowing, inspiration and support:

Princess Cuddlebug

Princess Sunshine

Craze & Co.

The Shaman

The Pillar

F’n Bob

The Warden

The Entire Putt-Putt-Putter Clan

FaeriePrincess

Professor Siggy Chong

Hoagie Snowflake

Sparky Wentz-eclaus

The VanMan and General Ralph Glossop (may they R.I.P.)

The Messengers of The Galactic Federation

The Looch

The Bassett Hound

Bert-On

The Baker of the Cornbread

Andy Pandy

The Mudder

Zason

Oh, Danny Boy

St. Diane & You

Brother John

Thing 1 & Thing 2

The Nameless One

Good Man, Charlie Brown

‘Jim’

The Rox

CCPA

Senoll #5

Superstar

Sir Richard Slouch

The Wix-ians

The Socialite

The Village of Idiots

Piz-Niffer

Dancing Queen

Downtown Encyclopedia Brown

Baby-Mama Rabbit

Belle

The Witch Baby

Aaaand, of course, a very generous sponsor who (not-so-much) wishes to remain anonymous.

It is…Sunday, September 6, 2020 Time...Discombobulated

Theme – Trust the Process

Lesson – Get Out of Your Mind

Observation – Everyone Talks About Someone

The Post

I’m having’ a time today. I worked my shift, struggling through it, and now I am here at The Soccer Park waiting until the sun goes down and I can park at The Putter’s for the night.

It has been quite a week. It has had me all over the place - physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.

When the week was starting out, Sunday night, I was still settling in for house sitting at the Baker’s. They left on Saturday. I closed Saturday night and opened on Sunday. So, there wasn’t much time for getting myself situated.

I had a full work of week ahead of me, with 40 hours scheduled at The Job and several hours expected at The Seasonal Store.

There was still one more adventure to be had with The Princesses.

I still had two posts to work on and complete.

And, I figured I had a week left to figure out just what I was going to do next in my living situation.

Needless to say, I didn’t get much done on Sunday night. I did a lot of sleeping. I was just exhausted from the back to back shifts. I made it through them alright, but by the end I was definitely struggling a bit to keep it together. Truth is, I can’t remember much of anything about Sunday night.

Monday morning I had work for The Seasonal Store scheduled at 0900. I feel like I may have had something else that morning as well. I know I got to the site about a half an hour early. The wouldn’t have happened coming straight from the house.

*sigh.* This is so typical anymore. Everything tends to be a blur. I could credit this to old age, but, really, it’s just that things happen so rapidly and constantly around me anymore.

So, I set in to my day of work with The Seasonal Store. It was different than I was anticipating but it wasn’t bad overall. We weren’t as far as I would have liked when I left, but we were far enough to make a difference.

I left the site between 1300-1400. I was just feeling kinda beat. I also had another matter of business to which I wanted to attend. I wanted to treat myself to a little something. I’ve been very blessed and abundant lately and I have spent so much of it on The Princesses. I wanted to do a little something just for me. I really wasn’t sure about it most of the day. However, in the end, it seems it was the best thing to do. Leaving work when I did also afforded me the chance to catch up with The Professor and The Putter - something else that hasn’t happened in some time.

On Monday, I would take a call with The GM. He wanted to know if, on Tuesday, I could work 12-CL instead of 10-8. This was going to be a 12 hour day. Of course, I agreed. It’s just what I do. The rest of Monday I can not recall.

Tuesday was a shit show.

I went in feeling strong and ready. In fact, I was there by 11. I had something else that morning too, I think. Or maybe it was just that I needed to eat. I know I wanted to be able to take my time and look at the day ahead, so I certainly didn’t want to get there at the last minute. I rarely do anyway, and for the reason already mentioned.

I had a very rough day, for so many reasons, and only one of them was the length of my shift. And, that was the least of them.

I am getting frustrated with The Job - for the same reason I have gotten frustrated with others in the past. I strive to do my best. This includes, doing things the way they are supposed to be done. It’s just who I am. It’s what I’ve learned. It’s what I know.

Unfortunately, not everyone does. Sometimes, it seems to me, there is an attitude in the world that we just have to go against the system. I see it all the time at The Job. People - crew and management alike - blatantly choosing to buck the system and not do something they should, or vice-versa. Some of it is dumb petty shit. Some of it is much more important.

I know I shouldn’t let others’ attitudes bother me, but as a manager it is my job to make sure the crew is doing what they are supposed to do. As a manager, I am responsible. So, I have to worry about the crew. I worry about the managers because their attitude affects the effectiveness of my work. So many things I have tried to put into motion - things the company wants us to do - and as soon as I am gone from the store it doesn’t t matter. The other managers have their own ways. So this makes The Job frustrating and even discouraging. What am I doing there if I can’t do my job. Doing my job is the part I like about The Job. So, if I can’t really do that, then what am I doing? Just earning a paycheck?

It’s really not that great of a check, I promise you. It suffices and I am very grateful to have it. But, it’s really not that great. I recently told someone how much I make an hour.

“Oh.”

Yeah. “Oh.” It’s really not that great.

Anyway, there was a lot of this attitude going on when I arrived and it just set my day off wrong. Really. What am I doing there if I can’t do my job?

Then, of course, the day was long. 12 hours to be exact. I started at 1130 and we were done closing by 2330. it was a hard shift. I had people call off and people go home early. I ran my ass off for 10 of those 12 hours. I lost my cool. All of my patience and composure went out the window. I seriously almost quit 4 times on Tuesday. I had to talk myself out of it each time. And each time, it was only the pay that had me stay. But, I made it through the day with a little bit of sanity.

Wednesday it was time to Quest once more. After I picked The Princesses up, I told them that this one was mine. I gave them Wellsboro. I gave them Mystic. This was my day and I was bringing them along. I still gave them most of the day lol.

Anyway, I picked them up at 0800 and we set immediately on our way to breakfast. This was the first of two scheduled stops for the day. A third would culminate along the way. This day formed itself while we were in Mystic. Everywhere we went, we came across those racks with brochures in them. I’m a fiend. I am. I’m addicted. I have to know what’s there - just in case I want to do it. [I have a file folder full of take homes. *shrugs*]

So, at one of these racks we found a brochure for Gettysburg, PA. I told them we should go some day. In fact, I said, we can stop someplace for breakfast along the way. I didn’t plan on doing it so soon, but the opportunity presented itself and…If I Can, I Will.

For breakfast we went to a place called Shady Maple. It has been a long time since I have been there myself. The Princesses have been there for some sort of show with Craze. So, it wasn’t the usual set-up when they went. We were in for the full thing this day.

This is the Mac Daddy of buffet restaurants. The Grand Poobah, if you will. We each had three to four plates, all with different things on them, and I don’t think that between us we had a little of everything that was offered. For my first plate I fixed nothing but meats and potatoes. I love em!

The Princesses were ecstatic. They loved it and couldn’t get enough. The funny part is that on the way there they complained that I feed them too good. They don’t eat much, just like me. But, when we are together we eat well. We certainly ate well that morning.

Shady Maple includes an incredible general merchandise store on the floor below. It is worth the trip through it, but we decided we would save that for another time.

That’s such a hard thing for me at the moment - “another time.” There has been a lot of that on our adventures of late. Everyplace we have been could, technically, be a day trip. We didn’t travel outside of 4 hours in any direction. That may sound like a lot for a day trip, but it’s really not. In Mystic, Cuddlebug said it, “ We can do that another time.”

“Kid, you have greater faith than I.”

I mean, realistically, I have no idea what comes next in my life. I don’t know how I get fully on my feet at this point. Financially, I am still scraping. I don’t know if I can afford more than a room, if that, so I certainly can’t promise any adventures. Besides, it took ten years of their lives to give them all of this. [And I really only pulled it off because of tax returns and Covid relief.]

So, we made our way to Gettysburg. I have only been there once before, and it was brief. I believe it was 2009, soon after Mama Rabbit left. Well, a few months anyway. I had a friend who wanted to take me there for a Quest. He was trying to help me out. I know this. But, it became a tense moment for us both.

He had intended on taking me on the battlefield tour. This was something special to him. He wanted to share it with me and I can appreciate that. However, he was not really clear on all of this prior to the tension.

You see, fellow travelers, we drove into the center square [or is it a circle?] and I was captured. I needed to get out and see this town. That is when all hell broke loose. He was very upset with me about this and I was apparently ruining his day. I did find a compromise. The battlefield tour starts in town, loops around, and comes back through. It is the smaller of the two loops formed. I suggested he go do that loop while I explore the town. Then, I would meet up with him and do the rest. He agreed, but reluctantly, because, “it just wasn’t the same.”

This is one of those moments on which I often look back. He was so angry angry with me and this was the first of two similar moments that would end the friendship. Was I wrong? Was I too ego-driven? How do the scales weigh a moment like that?

He was trying to help. He was trying to give me what he thought I needed - a Quest. Now, for me, a Quest usually involves two things. First, no real planning. Plans change on a Quest. In order to be effective, the Quest must be allowed to be in ‘control.’ It will take you where you need to go. Second, a Quest usually involves towns. This is how I quest. This is where I find my answers and my peace.

He meant no harm, nor did I. And, yet, so much was done.

So, we pull into the main circle square and find a parking spot on one of the off roads. Of course, Sunshine must find a restroom. I suggested we head back up the street to the main section and see what we can find. As we strolled through the circle square…

WALT: Hey…Maybe it’s a circle when you’re driving it, but a square when you walk it.

*blank stare*

WALT: Man of many colours, dude. Man of many colours.

Well, at least today you’re talking smart.

WALT: I always talk smart. You just hear dumb.

Why, I oughta…

WALT: You oughta, but you won’t. You never do.

Excuse me?

DOC: Actually…he’s kinda correct. You’re not much of a risk taker. You should put yourself out zere more. You hold back.

What?

DOC: Zumtimez you must chust grab life by…

WALT: Johnny’s balls.

Oh, God.

JOHNNY: You are very right, Walter…

Oh, no. See what you’ve done now? You’ve given him a reason to talk.

WALT: What’s my job, if not to make you squirm? Enjoy.

JOHNNY: For, you see Reverend, those are the two balls of Focus and Discipline. If you hold those two balls in your hand, Reverend, there is nothing you cannot do.

WALT: Every time he wants you to hold his balls.

You are juvenile.

WALT: I don’t know about that, but I’m certainly a delinquent.

May I continue please?

DOC: Of course.

JOHNNY: No one is stopping you, Reverend.

WALT: I was trying to.

Hush.

So, we are making our way through the square when, out of idle curiosity, I looked back over my shoulder and spotted a marketplace. Lark Marketplace. I made note of the animal reference and commented that we should come back and check it out. One of The Princesses asked if it might have a restroom.

“It just might.”

It did. And, they found it before I could get a foot in the door.

Tuesday, September 1, 2020; 0554

So, it’s now Tuesday. This is how it always goes and why it can be so difficult, and challenging to get a post done. Yet, I have such drive [desire] to get them done.

I had to take a break on Sunday night. I can only write for so long at any one sitting. Then my brain begins to hurt. It wasn’t long before I would fall asleep.

I woke yesterday and loaded the car with what I would need - cot, air mattress, blankets - and headed out for my day. I had work at The Seasonal Store. There was time to kill and I piddled it away. I just didn’t have a clear head and that stuck with me most of the day. The DM at The Seasonal Store even commented on this.

I stayed several hours and then headed to Old Geistopia to pick up the tent. Mama’s whatever he is dropped it off there in the day. I took a moment to visit with The Putter. I needed to unwind a bit. I’ve been having a tougher time than I let on. It hasn’t been anything dreadful and nothing to worry yourselves with, Fellow Travelers.

In that downtime, I would receive a text from Looch. It was job oriented. An opportunity opening up. He joked that maybe he shouldn’t tempt me. He doesn’t know just how perfect the timing was.

I need to do something. Something is definitely not right in my work/life balance.

The other thing that came out of that visit was a realization.

With WTML, the devil is in the details. It’s not just about The who or the what. It is also very much about the when, the where, and the how. That is what makes telling the stories difficult at times. It is what makes it hard on my head. I have to constantly filter, and sort, through it all.

The day at the beach - the way the water played with me, the ‘appearance’ of Poseidon - is less random when you consider the encounter with The Merfolk the night before.

[Also, an interesting side note, The Putter told me that there was a Humpback Whale spotted just off the Jersey Shore. Just under a week later. Maybe it was a whale I sensed that day after all.]

Anyway, that was an almost refreshing part of my day. I made my way to The Baker’s, set-up camp, and settled in. Incidentally, The Putter, in his usual fashion, was clearing out stuff and asked if I needed a table for anything. As a matter of fact, I did. I was already thinking about grabbing my one work table from The Cave. I wanted something to set-up in the tent. This table was the perfect size. [It works if you work it…or, let it work you.]

I awoke this morning feeling more like myself. I have another day at The Seasonal Store and a lot of things ahead of me, but I feel good. Maybe it was all the fresh air while I slept.

Anyway, let’s continue with our adventure…

So, the girls found the restroom and this left me to wander on my own. It was a beautiful shop, and if you ever find yourself in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, I strongly recommend you visit the Lark Marketplace. [Lark. Make a note of it. I did, before we entered.] Anyway, I milled about as I usually do - just floating to and fro, here and there, however the whims may blow. The Quest was on and it was time to divine some messages.

How did I know the Quest was on? I spotted a flamingo of course. I knew there were messages on their way. It was this rack that first caught my attention. One by one, in a very particular order the cards, by way of the animals on them, would draw my attention. After the ménage of post cards, I came face to face with a sign that read, “You are a little bit of magic.”

By now, The Princesses had emerged and had taken to floating around themselves. I really enjoyed this store, and found myself lost in it often. I was coming around the corner as I heard the saleswoman say, “Would you like your cigarettes in a bag or do you want to carry them?” It took a moment for my brain to recover as I glanced over to see the less than tween-age girl reaching across the counter for her pack. It was just a moment, a very brief moment. But, legit, my brain was like, “WTF?”

Then I got it. My brain caught up to itself again. Candy cigarettes. I gathered the girls together, and, of course, I bought them each a pack.

We chatted with the saleswoman [maybe part owner] for a bit. She and I talked about the bubblegum cigarettes of days past - the ones that would puff powder when you blew through them. Oh, those were good times.

Sunshine found this neat jewelry called Moonglow [I believe.] it was really cool actually. The woman had explained it to us. There is a book that tells you what phase the moon was in on any given day. Then there are little things that describe the energies of that moon and what a person born under that moon may be like. Sunshine was a Full Moon, while I am a New Moon. We both read our descriptions and agreed 100%.

As we chatted more with the woman, we mentioned where we were from. It turns out that her husband was a student teacher in the girls’ school during the 70’s. I smirked and looked at Cuddlebug. “Now that’s a sign,” I said. A sign of what I do not know. That we were on the right course? To trust in Synchronicity? Whatever it was, it was too random, too odd, too obscure to be anything but divine.

The only other thing that really caught my attention was that Cuddlebug said she really liked the store, “It has a good aesthetic.” She wasn’t wrong. I was just surprised to hear her use the word. She’s always had an eye for design and organization. [I think she gets that from me.] The Rabbit Hole had been in my head while we were in the shop and now I found myself thinking that she would be good to help set it up and merchandise it. From the shop, we went downstairs to an artist co-op.

Wednesday, September 2, 2020; 0701

I just can’t seem to get caught up. And, I feel extra stressed because tomorrow starts my week at The Job and for three days there will be no getting anything done. I close tomorrow, all but open on Friday [in at 7] and work till 5 then I have to be back in at 5 on Saturday. It gets harder and harder to do this. It really is breaking my body and my spirit. But, it is what I have at the moment. I’m trying to be responsible…

WALT: Why start now?

Nobody asked for your input. But, you’re right. Or, so it seems. From the outside, I can imagine, anyway. At times, especially with work, I can be irresponsible. In the past, it has been nothing for me to quit a job. Usually, on the spur of the moment. I had less to worry about at the time and there was always something else around the corner. Or, so I thought. It didn’t always work out that way. So, here I am kind of locked in a job I’m not enjoying. I want to just leave. Believe me. The thought of going in tomorrow puts knots in my stomach. Still, I don’t want to leave until I know I can replace the income. Now, I know that I can get full time at The Seasonal Store but it is only temporary and it is a pay cut. There are other options out there. I just need time to explore them. I’m hoping tomorrow before work will find time to take care of some business.

Of course, maybe I need to get rid of it before I can find something new. This is how my internal struggle begins and why people think I’m aloof. Yes, there are physical principles to life, such as needing an income. But, there are also subtler principles that we engage in all the time and never recognize. We do it in small ways, on simple tasks. Rarely do we transfer them into major life decisions. Maybe we should. If you want new things, you need to get rid of the old things. If you want to fill a space, you must clear a space. If you want a plant to grow and thrive, you must trim away the dead parts.

The Seasonal Store has been going ok. There is definitely a different sense in the air about it this year and maybe I’m glad the manager thing didn’t work out. I haven’t been putting in many hours this week. Just Enough. I’ve needed time to get the tent set-up and now organized…and to rest. I’ve slept quite a bit the last two nights. I don’t know if it’s the fresh air or the fact that I can actually sleep with some comfort, but I have definitely been sleeping.

I still find myself frustrated and frantic. As usual, I feel both blessed and cursed. For instance, I’ve come across a good stash of metal. Altogether, maybe 20 bucks. It’s steel and steel isn’t worth much on its own. So begins the trials and tribulations. I may need to ask to use the truck so I can get it all at once. But, without a day off, or a place to store it in the meantime, that is going to mean getting the truck one afternoon, loading it after work, parking with it overnight, taking the metal in the morning and returning the truck, then going to work.

This is just part of my struggles with that. Metal scrapping is obviously a part of my life. I don’t have to go looking for it. It comes to me. So, whatever my life is moving forward, it should be able to accommodate this work. That means a better suited vehicle, a home that can support the effort. Or does it? I’m making do with it all now, but I sometimes have to borrow a truck, or use the cave to store things until I can make a run.

It’s interesting. I’ve been telling the girls we’re celebrating. Everything we’ve done - every trip, every meal, every moment - has been about celebrating life - as it has been and for all that it will become. We are setting the stage for greater things. Or, so I’ve been telling myself.

I don’t know how I feel about that right this moment.

Back to Gettysburg…

So, we head down the steps to this artist co-op. There’s a few guys playing Pokémon or Magick the gathering, or some sort of something like that. This dude gets up immediately and welcomes us. We got the fifty-cent tour. This was a common area for everyone. There were studios in the back for members. They had a coffee shop and used books to help supplement the co-op. We partook in some drinks and it took a while for them to be prepared. Apparently, they roast the beans right there. Hmmm.

Anyway, we looked around and hung out and chatted. I kept thinking about The Rabbit Hole. This was a very similar premise. So, it can be done. But how do I do it?

We left the coffee shop and wandered about. I’m not exactly sure what we did or what we chatted about. The town was neat and definitely worth exploring some more. We never really got away from that center circle square. We did however, find ourselves in a candy store.

Yes. We were all three the epitome of a kid in a candy store. There were lots of oohs and ahhhs coming from all of us. We received quite a few strange looks along the way. It was kind of like breakfast. In fact, we received strange looks all day, everywhere we went. We were just having so much fun - laughing, carrying on. In Mystic, Cuddlebug said several times that we should have our own reality show. We’ve talked about that several times before. Sometimes one just can’t believe the things that happen along the way. I definitely concur with her. We should at least have a web-series. Or, at the very least WTML should return to more videos and they should be a greater part of them.

In the candy store we found two things of particular interest, beyond the gobs of candy we bought. First, we found those bubblegum cigarettes . The girls had never seen them before, so we bought them and subsequently took one back to the woman. [Who was in break, so we left it.]

When we were going to Wellsboro, I told the girls of this soda that their mother and I had found there in our trip. It’s a small company and I’ve never seen them anywhere but Wellsboro. I told the girls that it was good soda. It comes in all kinds of flavors and is made with pure cane sugar. Well, here it was and we all got some.

After all of that, we checked out a toy store and then headed to the battlefield. After a pit stop for Sunshine, of course.

Thursday, September 3, 2020; 0829

And, here it is, another day. I still haven’t finished the Gettysburg story and there was so much more to last week. But, each day, time tics on at its own pace. Moments come and moments go, and suddenly, one day is nothing more than a blink of an eye. (Hey, I think I’ve read that somewhere before.)

I felt better yesterday than I did the previous two. I’m not looking forward to the next several weeks. They are not going to be easy, but I will survive them. Yesterday, I was able to get myself into the groove a little bit. I put in a good long[er] day at The Seasonal Store, managed a shower and even took care of a little business - getting life and thoughts in order.

One such thought was The Power of Prophecy. It is such a strange thing. For instance, at the end of last week, I received the message, “3 days, 3 weeks, 3 months.” At the time, I took it to mean 3 days from that moment, which would have brought us to Sunday. I wonder now, if it wasn’t something different. I noticed last night that it took me 3 days to get the tent set-up and settled.

Within those same 3 days, many things have developed. I have decided to look for other employment, away from The Job. I not only don’t make the money that I need to make, but I also am finding no satisfaction in the work anymore. It will do for now and I can muddle through it. There are other options out there. There is a warehouse job that keeps coming up. The pay would definitely be excellent, certainly compared to what I am making now. There wouldn’t be satisfaction in that job, but it would get me where I want to go financially. Looch shared a job opportunity with me. It is a small family owned company. I could definitely find satisfaction and fun there, but the pay may not leave me better off than I am at The Job. And, of course, there is The Seasonal Store. I could do it full-time for the season. It would be a hit financially, at a time when once again my financial needs are increased. But, I would definitely find satisfaction across the board.

Also, Big ‘D’ texts me last night to let me know that she needs to go in for open heart surgery, sooner rather than later. And, there was something about a pre-procedure next week. It was an awkward moment for me. First, I didn’t really know what to say. I mean it was basically, “Ok. Good luck. Thinking of you.” Rather generic, I know. It’s what I’d say to anyone really, and, though she is my mother, we just haven’t been that connected. I’ll send healing and positive energy her way [I’m doing it right this moment.] But, it’s just interesting to me how people are. We have only recently started engaging in a half-decent way. We haven’t really addressed any issues. We never do. We just reach a point when we act like it’s all ok. I noticed this pattern in the last few weeks. She gave money twice, to the girls, for us to go out and eat on our travels. Once in a birthday card to me and once before they left. That is how she does things. That means she is acting “back to normal.” It was nice of her. It was. But, it is just typical, and, for me, one of the issues. Everything equates to money. That is the connection. That is the communication. That is the expression. It was also awkward because, not once, in over a year and half - more I particularly recently - has she ever asked if I was ok, or how things were, or how I’m surviving. Yet, I am supposed to be aware of her medical things. Similarly, a few weeks ago, she randomly texted me that she had to go for a COVID test. She didn’t say why, nor did I ever hear another word about it. It seems she was going because of her upcoming procedures, not because she was exhibiting symptoms. It’s all good and I’m not trying to be judgey or anything. It’s just kind of sad that this is the best level we can achieve.

Nonetheless, I wasn’t satisfied with my response. So, a few moments later I asked if she needed anything.

Each day, brings so many thoughts and experiences. I know I say this all the time, but it is really hard to keep up with it all. In general, let alone in writing.

For instance, I keep thinking about my life and where it is at and where I am trying to get it to go. For all of my efforts and energies this year, I still find myself without a real home or an adequate income. [And, somewhere in these past months I started to lose my spirit.]

Perhaps, I am pursuing the wrong things. Perhaps, this experience is my life. This may be precisely what G-d has planned for the whole of my life, because, somehow, this might be how I better serve. Perhaps there is more to be seen in my life than what meets the eye.

Let’s get back to Gettysburg. There’s not much more, I promise.

We left the main part of town and headed for sites on the battlefield. When I was there the first time there were two sites that really spoke to me and they are right along the same path. You can see one from the other. As I said, once again we had to stop for The Bladder Patrol. I can’t remember how, but I do remember commenting that, once again, this pit stop worked in our favor. In fact, it was at that point that I gave it all a nickname. “uh-oh, better pay attention. Sunshine’s Bladder Sense is tingling.”

The Welcome Center was closed. This created a restroom ‘emergency.’ I found some city workers taking care of the landscaping and asked for guidance. [Ask & It Is Given, Seek & Ye Shall Find.] We were led to a public restroom on the other side of the battlefield. It took us right past where we wanted to go, and so, afterwards, we looped back around.

Welcome to Devil’s Den.

And, that over there is Little Round Top.

I do not know what it is about these two sites, but I am certainly drawn to them more than any other on the tour. There is a spot in Devil’s Den that has to do with a Sharpshooter’s death. The first time I was here, someone approached me behind that rock. I never did see him. I only felt him. And, I know he was trying to tell me something. I let The Princesses explore and before long we were on our way.

There was a debate on the way back to The Valley. I abhor driving on highways and main roads anytime of day, but most especially during rush hour. I was contemplating just sticking to the back and less traveled roads when Cuddlebug had a notion. What if we go to Funck’s for dinner? This is a restaurant that we discovered on our travels to Hersheypark. We all loved it from the very first visit. I scoped it out and it would add the same amount of time to go there and then home as it would to travel the backroads home. We hemmed and hawed quite a bit and finally the GPS was set and we were on our way. A little less than an hour into the drive, Sunshine asked if we were going to make plans for dinner soon. Cuddlebug responded with, “We’re going to Funck’s.”

“We are?”

“Aren’t we? I thought we were.”

“I thought you said to just go home the backroads.”

So, I adjusted our navigation and we set off once more. Of course, the place has changed names since our last visit and we had a very difficult time finding it. However, along the way, we discovered a Funck’s even closer to Hershey. We also ended up going through downtown York, which turns out to be quite a beautiful and quaint little bit of city. It is something, we all agreed, that was worth checking out sometime. Nonetheless, we enjoyed our time and meal at the new restaurant.

It is important to note that in the second part of the day, the driving lent itself to messages. Rabbit, Freedom, and Faith were the Themes of those messages.

I got The Princesses home about 13 1/2 hours after I had picked them up. That was 15 1/2 for me until I got back to where I was staying. It was a long day. It cost money that maybe I shouldn’t have spent. This makes it no different than any of our other recent adventures. But, also like all of our adventures of late, it fell together - naturally and on its own. All I did was Follow the Path or Least Resistance.

I feel this way about it -

First, we deserved it. It has been over a year and a half since I left Old Geistopia and our time together has been so very limited and brief. We’re always just sneaking in whatever time we can, when we can. And it is not much.

Second, we needed it. We all needed it.

And, finally, it worked itself out in an interesting fashion. All-in-all, our adventures - including the time at Brother John’s in between - totaled 10 days. Every year, for the past ten years, I have been allotted 2 non-consecutive weeks of vacation with The Princesses. Because of how my weekend schedule fell, more often than not, these ‘weeks’ totaled 10 days. It wasn’t often that we did much, unless Big ‘D’ or Boom-Dee-Aye had something planned. I just never had the funds to do a whole lot. I did what I could and we did have a good time. But we never really had any kind of a vacation.

This year, I was able to give them the equivalent of an actual vacation. We adventured into new territory and discovered things together. We traveled far and wide. It happened over a 10 day period which I do not find coincidental. And, more interesting, in its division, it lined itself up with both of our weeks in previous years. Our first week of vacation would always start on Father’s Day weekend. For Father’s Day weekend this year we were in Wellsboro. And, while we were in Mystic, many of my Facebook memories were of vacations past.

Anyway, as for now, I might as well follow the rhythm and flow of this post. I go to work at The Job tonight. I close and then I am in very early tomorrow morning for another 10 hour shift. I have some things to attend to before I go. And, I will find time to write after work tomorrow night. We still have Thursday and Friday of last week to cover.

[Psst...it's a slideshow.]

Friday, September 4, 2020; 2210

I’m having a very rough time at the moment. I don’t know what is wrong, or happening to me. [happened to me?]

It has been a very difficult 2 days. Difficult doesn’t do it justice. The timing is interesting to me. I had a difficult time the same two days last week as well.

So, the girls and I had a good time on our adventure. I dropped them off and returned to my lodgings much later than I had expected, or wanted. I wasn’t feeling right about the next day. I still don’t know why exactly.

In the morning, I would wake very early, and in a still groggy state, I would text the morning manger that I wouldn’t be in. I claimed back problems. This wasn’t as a conscious a thought as one might believe. The next thing I knew it was 5 hours later.

It wasn’t so much my back but I was feeling off. I didn’t realize it until the day was over but I needed the rest. I have been so non-stop lately.

Speaking of which, I should try to get some sleep. I need to work early in the morning. I was hoping to get it all out of my head before I slept, but I’m not sure that is going to happen…or how it will affect me if it does.

Ok…so…I took advantage of that time last Thursday. I got caught up on email and finances and even rest.

Friday I would return to The Job and I would find myself with back pain before the shift was over. In fact, they sent me home early. Karma, perhaps? Or, something more going on?

I got through The rest of the weekend fairly ok. I don’t recall anything one way or the other. [In fact, Saturday I was off.]

I find it an interesting thing though, because this week has been off as well.

Yesterday, I arrived at work at, what I believed was, my starting time. Only, it turns out I was 3 hours late. I know everything happens for a reason, but this irritated me. The schedule was changed and I wasn’t alerted. This put me in an absolutely foul mood for the rest of the day. I honestly thought, for a moment, about just turning right around and leaving.

Maybe I should have. I was in an horrible zone. I just had nothing in me. The frustrations had become too much. I never learn though.

I have decided that I really must look for something else. [I don’t see it happening though.] so, at the same time, I am trying to continue on my path to the promotion. I don’t really want it at this point, but, without something else, it is the only hope I have of getting things to a better place.

Today was particularly hard. I had all but given up and really didn’t care much about anything. I was in a miserable mood, but trying to hide it.

I was also having an emotional day. I had several small breakdowns today and I don’t really know what they were about.

By mid shift I was finding myself in pain. My back and legs were hurting. And I was having stomach troubles.

I would have a conversation with our district lead about my frustrations yesterday. I did feel better afterwards, but not immediately.

Eventually, I would return to The Tent.

WALT: Maybe we should call it ‘Camp’

I’m OK with that…for now. But, eventually, it will have to become Camp…something or other.

I tried to write then, but couldn’t. It did not take long before I found myself needing to lay down. I checked the time. 1801. I was out in no time. Several times I gained a bit of consciousness, but not a lot. It was that in between sleep and awake. In one of those in between a I was aware of a presence. Someone else was here. The. I was back out again.

Eventually, I would wake [or gain consciousness] but still I layer there. I was not able to move right away. It took many moments. I reached for the phone, wondering just how long I had been out.

1817.

Damn. That was only 16 minutes. It had felt so much longer.

Anyway, I eventually got myself up, but I haven’t felt right since. My body is weak. My stomach feels like a hole in my body. My back is tender and my leg is hurting. I am having a lot of difficulty moving and walking.

I feel odd.

But, for now, I must take my leave. I really do need to get up for work in the morning. I just hope I can move. *sigh* the nights are getting chilly fast.

Saturday, September 5, 2020; 1838

This is my first moment of rest since just before 0400 this morning. I got up, got myself together, and headed to work. I arrived with just a bit of time to spare. I then worked my 10 1/2 hour shift. I drove back to camp, got myself together and hopped into The Baker’s for a shower. I, the , got myself together and ran to Old Geistopia to dig something out for Sunshine. [She needs the keyboard for music class.] I stopped for my coffee fill-up, and am now back at Camp.

Now…I have taken an hour to myself and we are several clicks later in time.

I made it through my day and of that I am very glad. I still don’t feel right. Something in my gut. It is very physical, whatever it is. I’ve gone through it before. It just seems different this time. I feel heavier. My stomach still feels like a hole. I’m not concerned about it, other than I don’t know what causes it. It will all clear and I will feel better for it.

The Job is still a thorn in my mental side. I don’t hate it, but it certainly takes a toll on me. I wouldn’t mind, except that I find myself living in a tent and uncertain that I can find a way out. I like the people and I can enjoy myself at work. But, it can be very stressful…and it wreaks havoc on the empath me.

I still don’t know what last night was. The whole experience kinda tripped me out. I almost have to wonder if how I feel today has anything to do with that experience.

3 weeks and we find ourselves closing out the first, Fellow Travelers. I can’t really say what came of it. Nor can I guess what is to come. But, I feel confident that it is all good.

I wish [that word makes me uneasy] that I had a little more in me for writing, but it has been an almost crippling several days. I’m satisfied with this post. It was a lot to write and a lot to work through, but I like the way it came together in the end.

Tomorrow I work my usual Sunday shift. I’m not really in the mood, but it is what it is…and it is what I have at the moment. After work, I want to tweak this post into existence, take care of the finer details - totems, pictures, etc, etc. and, I want to start the next one. [Director’s Note: I am changing the section title from Totems to Totems & Archetypes.]

If you’re not already there go to the Welcome to my Life Facebook page - WTML, or the YouTube Channel - Welcome to my Life.

Wherever you are, and whenever you are, Like, Comment and Share. Let us know you’re there.

So, without hesitation…

For now and for always, from here in Geistopia, this is your beloved Rev…

WALT: And Walt…

DOC: Unt Doc…

JOHNNY: Aaaand Johnny…

And, those guys, saying, “stay tuned in Fellow Travelers,” and wishing you Peace, Love, Light…

WALT: ...and freakishness, baby!!

The Totems & Archetypes

**from Ted Andrews’ Animal Speak**

Flamingo [spirit-animals.com]

Flamingo symbolism is reminding you to get in touch with your emotions. It is a good idea to allow yourself to feel so that you can process your feelings. Furthermore, this spirit animal will enable you to grow through releasing issues. In other words, if you bottle things up, you will find yourself reacting rather than acting appropriately. Therefore, the Flamingo meaning dictates that you must allow yourself to release your feelings so that you can come into balance again. Alternatively, like the Prairie Dog, Flamingo symbolism may be letting you know that it is time for you to get out and socialize. Therefore it is time to have some fun in your life. Moreover, socializing will help let go of stressful situations and coming to terms with changes in your life. Correspondingly, this bird also brings new ideas and options that will come to you while immersing yourself in the company of others. It will also allow you to find balance and gratitude for what you have. It will give you a greater appreciation of those around you. Conversely, Flamingo symbolism may be pointing out that you are blending in a bit too well right now. In other words, you need to allow yourself to be different and to think for yourself. Thus, the Flamingo meaning prompts you to maintain your individuality within the crowds.

Penguin - Lucid Dreaming and Astral Projection

Reflects an awakening of dream consciousness. Expect to experience lucid dreams. As you change the dream state you also change the same energies that are playing upon you in your own waking life as well. The ability to leave the body. How to consciously go out of the body. Expert at slipping in and out of the body - in full consciousness. Feminine, birth-giving energies. Reflects a greater assertion and expression of that within your life. Very likely to be a two-month priod in which you nurture, protect and help hatch your creative energies. Greater awakening in dreams, altered states and creation.

Cricket –[from Spirit-animal.com]

Like the Ladybug and the Dragonfly, Cricket symbolism is a sign of exceptional luck. Furthermore, this spirit animal says that the things that you have been working toward and dreaming about are now possible. Therefore Cricket meaning directs you to stay open to guidance and messages so that you will know what you have to do. You may be guided to buy a lottery ticket, interview for a new job, or be in the right place at the right time. In other words, Cricket symbolism is letting you know that all things are possible right now. All you have to do is feel that you deserve it! Similar to the Robin and the Whale, people with Cricket totem know how to sing their songs loud and clear! In other words, they love to use the power of their voice to attract what they want in life. These folks also have a gift for finding their way through awkward moments with panache and aplomb. People with this spirit animal are excellent communicators, love to walk their talk and are often vegetarian. In fact, like the Deer totem, they understand the power of music and will usually have a career that uses music as a form of healing.

Fox - Feminine Magic of Camouflage, Shapeshifting and Invisibility.

New world opening up. The process of creation is beginning. Guide to enter the Faerie Realm. Unless a male can recognize the magic of the feminine - in himself or others - and learn to use it to Shapeshifting hs own life, it will ultimately lead to destruction. The Kundalini, and the freeing of the creative life force. Practicing and using camouflage. Working to blend in with surroundings, to come and go unnoticed, moving silently about without revealing your intentions. Learning to control the aura. Adjust its frequency and intensity so that you harmonize more with others. Levels of energy and fertility. If the focus stays on the creative energies, any sharp turn in the individual’s life will be handled with ease. Fox people have the ability to insulate themselves from anything that may seem cold, especially in relationships. Can appear larger than they are - for personal protection or for making greater impressions. Establish a trotting pace. Ability to move into new directions. Call upon new resources instinctively. Excellent ability to hear what is not being said. The ability to hear spirit. Size people up accurately. Develop the ability to see spirit. Aromatherapy. Awakening of the Kundalini. Higher forms of discrimination and discernment. Capture any prize.

The Phoenix -

When the Phoenix comes into your life, make no doubts about the powerful message it brings. It comes with a strong message of hope. The Phoenix comes to reassure you that you will rise from the ashes. And, not just that! This spirit animal comes to guide you out of despair, to offer you a second chance. As such, this bird is most likely to appear to you when you are down and out. At such times, only a miracle can save you. The phoenix spirit animal is that miracle! It renews your strength and fortifies your fighting spirit. Quite suddenly, you’ll start seeing opportunities in places that look hopeless. No matter the kind of challenges life is subjecting you to, the Phoenix encourages you to endure. And to fight for your lost glory! If you are on a trying spiritual journey, this is a powerful message. The phoenix spirit guide makes its way into your life to guide, coach and protect you. The spiritual journey is often perilous. Unfortunately, you may be unable to change this without some powerful intervention. When you welcome the presence of the Phoenix totem into your life, you get the guidance you need on this journey. But, remember, the Phoenix is one of the most powerful totems out there. You need to invite it gently. Invite this spirit with clear and honest intentions.

Hawk - Visionary Power and Guardianship.

Messengers, protectors and visionaries. Visionary power and leading you to your life purpose. There is a message coming. What you eat, you become. Kundalini. Childhood visions are becoming empowered and fulfilled. The ability to soar and glide upon the currents. Great Heights while still keeping your feet on the ground. Attacks by people who won’t understand you - attack your ability to soar. Teaching of higher expression of psychosis and vision. Beauty and harmony in moderation. Lead you to using your creative energy in manifesting your soul purpose. Hope and new ideas. A need to be open to the new or shows ways that you may help teach others to be open to the new. Be observant. Life is sending signals. Careful in expression. Comments and actions will be strong and powerful with the ability to tear and/or kill.

Horse - Travel, Power, and Freedom

Associated with burial rites and birth. Associated with appeal and persuasiveness. Symbols of freedom. Powers of divination. Can express the more magickal side of humans. Can represent movement and travel, or maybe it showed up to help you with movement. Symbol of desire - especially sexual. May be time to examine aspects of travel and freedom in your life. Feeling constricted? Need to move on or let others move on? Time to assert your freedom and your power in new areas? Doing your part to assist civilization in your environment? Are others? Are you Yo outing what this civilization has given you. New journeys. Teach you how to ride into new directions to awaken and discover your own freedom and power.

Cardinal - Renewed Vitality through Recognizing Self-Importance

They remind us that, regardless of the time of day or year, we always have the opportunity to renew our own vitality and recognize our own life roles. Whistles are often reminders to listen closely - to pay attention to what is blowing on the winds. Reflects that we should be listening to the inner voice (the feminine) more closely for our own health and well-being. Almost always reflects a need to assert the feminine aspects of creativity and intuition more strongly. Can reflect a need to b more careful about your diet, that what you are eating may be injurious to yourself and affecting your overall vitality. Reflects the rhythm of 12 that is going to become more predominant within your own life. Reflects lessons associated with responsibility and the recognition of the task at hand. May reflect past-life connections with the church, or even a reviving of more traditional religious beliefs, regardless of denomination. Remind us to add color to our lives, and remember that everything is of importance.

Dragonfly – The Power of Light

Inhabit two realms – water and air. The significance of these should be studied. There must be expressions of the emotional and the mental together. You may need some fresh air in regards to something emotional. You may need to gain new perspective or make a change. May even indicate that you are neglecting your emotions. Are you being too rational about everything? Are you not keeping the colors of emotion alive?

Elephant – Ancient Power, Strength and Royalty

Royalty and fertility. The Hindu god of wisdom and success, Ganesha. Symbol of great sexual power. Neptune, prophecy, fertility and even family. Higher forms of discrimination. Open to energies and worlds otherwise inaccessible. Ivory from a spiritual and metaphysical aspect should be studied. The Maiden, Mother, and Crone. The opportunity to reestablish powerful family and societal ideals will occur. Prepare to draw upon the most ancient wisdom and power. Opportunity to help yourself or others regain your most primordial royalty.

Whale – Creation, Power of Song, Awakening Inner Depths

Imitating the spouting breath of a whale can aid in freeing your own creative energies. Can help teach you to insulate and use your own creative energies more conservatively. How to use the creative forces of breath for a variety of purposes. Can stimulate reasoning capabilities and creative thinking. Teach us how to create through sound and song, adjusting it to the time and place and individual. By drawing on your own creative instincts, you can sing forth your own song. The primal creative sounds of life. Sound is the creative force of life. Directing it and responding to its feedback is part of what whale teaches. Can be used to tap hidden levels of your own mind, or even to accelerate the manifestation of goals. Symbols of containment, concealment, and even resurrection. When we learn to go deep within ourselves, the creativity that we awaken can resurrect our own lives. Are you becoming lost in your own creative imagination? Are you not taking it and using it in your outer life? Are you keeping everything inside and afraid to let it out? If so, it is time to breach. Show the magnificence and power of your own creativity. Do not hold back. Examine your use – or lack of use – of your own creativity. Are you simply mimicking what others have done or are you building upon it in new and dynamic ways? Are you applying your own creative intuition to old processes and life formulas? This and this alone is what imbues them with power and magic. Creativity for the sake of creativity is not what the whale teaches. It awakens great depths of creative inspiration, but so it can add color and light to your outer life to make it more wonderous.

Eagle - Illumination of Spirit, Healing, and Creation.

Balance of being of the Earth, but not in it. The soul, the spirit, and warmth of life. The resurrection. Punishment and reward. Greater sight and perception. Reflects an awakening ability or the need to learn to walk between worlds. Heroic nobility and divine spirit. The rediscovery of the inner child. Alchemy. Involvement with creativity. A willingness to experience extremes in a controlled condition. A willingness to use your passions to purify and to use your abilities, even if you get scorched a little in the process. The need to stay connected to and use things of the Earth. Important to know when to speak, how much, how strongly. New vision will open. The ability to hear - spiritually and physically - may also increase. Cooperative responsibility. A healing role. Opportunities (even those thought long lost) will arise - learn to see and snatch them up. A new sense of timing and movement will begin to develop Primal force inherent and easily awakened. Take on the responsibility and the power of becoming so much more than you now appear to be. Events will now fly faster, repercussions for everything you think, do and say (or fail to) - positive and negative - will be both stronger and quicker. A powerful new dimension to life and a heightened responsibility for your spiritual growth. Touch all of life with healing and become the mediator and the bearer of new creative forces within the world.

11:11 (from sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.com)

The repeating number 1 sequence (in all it’s forms) is most often the first sequence that appears to many people. Once the 1111 is acknowledged, the number sequence changes to another combination along with new messages, life experiences, directions and opportunities. Many people associate the repeating 1111 with a ‘wake-up call’, a ‘Code of Activation’ and/or an ‘Awakening Code’, or ‘Code of Consciousness’. It can also be seen as a key to unlock the subconscious mind, and reminds us that we are spiritual beings having a physical experience, rather than physical beings embarking upon spiritual experiences.

Upon noticing a frequency of 1111’s appearing repeatedly, you may begin to see an increase in synchronicities and unlikely and miraculous coincidences appearing in your life. At times, when you are about to go through a major spiritual awakening or an epiphany of some kind, the number 1111 may appear in your physical reality and experience to signal the upcoming change or shift.

When noticing the Angel Number 1111 appearing, take notice of the thoughts you had right at that moment, as 1111 indicates that your thoughts and beliefs are aligned with your truths. For example, if you held an inspired idea at the time of seeing 1111, it would indicate that it would be a positive and productive idea to take action on. When Angel Number 1111 appears repeatedly it signifies that an energetic gateway has opened up for you, and this will rapidly manifest your thoughts into reality. The message is to choose your thoughts wisely, ensuring that they match your true desires. Do not put your energy into focusing on fears as you may manifest them into your life.

Angel Number 1111 is a message from your angels to be very aware of your persistent thoughts and ideas as these are manifesting quickly into your reality. Ensure that your beliefs, thoughts and mind-sets are positive and optimistic in order to draw the energies of abundance and balance into your life. Be aware that you will manifest your thoughts, therefore, do not think negative thoughts as these are what you will draw into your life. Use the positive energies of the Universe to bring to fruition your deepest desires, hopes and dreams.

Angel Number 1111 signifies that an energetic gateway has opened up for you, and this will rapidly manifest your thoughts into your reality. There is an opportunity opening up for you, and your thoughts are manifesting them into form at lightening speed. Angel Number 1111 is similar to the bright light of a flashbulb. It means that the Universe has just taken a snapshot of your thoughts and is manifesting your ideas, thoughts and beliefs into material form, creating your experiences and realities.

333 (from sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.com)

Angel Number 333 tells you that the Ascended Masters are near you. They have responded to your prayers and wish to help and assist you in your endeavours and with serving your life purpose and soul mission. Angel Number 333 encourages you to be creative, social and communicative and use your natural abilities and talents to empower yourself and uplift and enlighten others as your lightworking abilities and life mission are to be utilized for the good of all. Keep a positive attitude about yourself, others and the world in general in order to manifest peace, love and harmony. Have faith in humanity as a whole and the future of our world. Live your truths and express yourself with clarity, purpose and love, and be a positive light to others.

Use your natural communicative and lightworking skills to aid, assist and serve others in positive and uplifting ways.

[Director’s Note: 333 also correlates with the Daemon Choronzon.]

66 (from sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.com)

Angel Number 66 is a message from your angels to put your faith and trust in the benevolence of the Universe as your daily needs are continually met. The angels are assisting, guiding and supporting you with manifesting your goals, desires and wishes. Keep your thoughts positive when the Angel Number 66 appears.

Angel Number 66 also asks you to balance your physical, material and spiritual lives. Focusing on your spirituality and living a conscientious and purposeful lifestyle will ensure that your material needs are met as you serve your Divine life mission. Give any fears or anxieties about your monetary and material issues to the angels for healing and transmutation, and trust that as you live your spiritual truths all of your needs will be provided for. Be open to receiving and accepting help and assistance from your angels, the spiritual realm and other people in your life.

Angel Number 66 also suggests that all is well in regards to your home and family life. Enjoy your relationships and the companionship of those close to you and give love freely and unconditionally.