S2:EP10 -The 2019 Chronicles: The In-Betweens

Hey, gang! Welcome to my life – where anything is possible and nothing is as it seems. I’m Freedom and I’ll be your host, coming at you from within the depths of Geistopia.

DOC: Velcum To My Life ees a prochect, un experiment in Life unt ART. A living storyboard, if you will. Its premise ees zat life ees experiential, unt zat you can, unt do, experience ze life you choose. It ees based on Ze Veel of Life unt Ze ARTs for Ze New Millennium as life building tools. Yeah, it’s true.

WALT: Welcome to my Life is an I T.V. Studios/Geist…House Players Production, in association with the Center for Creative Inspirationalism. JustUs Productions, the parent company, would like to give a ‘Shout-Out’ to the following for their ongoing, and oft-times unknowing, inspiration and support:

Princess Cuddlebug

Princess Sunshine

Craze & Co.

The Shaman

The Pillar

F’n Bob

The Entire Putt-Putt-Putter Clan

FaeriePrincess

Professor Siggy Chong

The VanMan and General Ralph Glossop (may they R.I.P.)

PDT

‘Blue 326’

The Original KLT

The Looch

The Baker

Bert-on

Andy Pandy

The Bassett Hound

The Mudder

Hoagie, aka Snowflake

Danny Boy

The Wix-ians

Piz-Niffer

Dancing Queen

The Anomaly

Downtown Encyclopedia Brown

Baby-Mama Rabbit

My Belle

Aaaand, of course, a very generous sponsor who (not-so-much) wishes to remain anonymous.

It is…Monday, June 17, 2019. Time...Stalling.

Theme of the Week – Engage and Enjoy

Lesson of the Week – Each Day, Each Moment, Unto Itself

Observation of the Week – I can exhibit very self-sabotaging behavior

Feedback: My Belle asks, “How do you pick your totems? Or, how do you know what they are?”

“One does not pick Totems. Totems pick the person,” was my first response, which illicited the second question.

To that, the answer is a bit more involved. It’s hard for me to explain or describe at this point in my journey. After a time you just know. You get a sense. Until then, you must simply make note - what animals appear? When? How frequent? What animals are you drawn to? Which stand out to you in your day? Pay attention and you will learn.

It felt good to write last week.

WALT: It felt good to be written.

Do you need a voice, Walt? Do you need expression?

WALT: I do. I’m sensitive like that.

Just a big old cuddly teddy bear, huh?

WALT: That’s what your mom said.

Dude!! Mom jokes are bad enough, but that is wrong on just so many levels.

*WALT shrugs*

DOC: Ve should talk about zese issuez.

Doc! You are not shrinking my head. Good Lord, you’re already inside it.

DOC: I know unt ve should really talk about zese

issuez.

*shakes head* So, anyway...

It did feel good to get back to writing. It made for a long difficult day on Monday, but it was good to let things flow and see just which direction the story did go.

The whole Two Week story was pretty intense. It was intense to live. It was intense to write out and relive. Technically, the whole thing isn’t over. I’m still living on the brink of disaster. But, relief is on its way.  It still may arrive too late, but it will arrive. Still, it won’t leave me in a place with which I’ll be completely comfortable. Yet, in the end, it all worked out perfectly.

*sighs* I find myself with a case of The In-Betweens. That wonderful state of existence where I find myself bridged between two ends of existence.

I’m happy enough to be doing alright; depressed enough to not be ok.

I’m working enough to be busy; Idle enough to be getting bored.

I’m manifesting enough money to survive; I’m broke enough not to thrive.

It’s across the board right now too. The Theatre for instance - I’m working and things aren’t great but they are showing possibility of improving (or at least shifting.) but, there is no real idea as to when that may happen.

Of course that will also influence my income.

I’m in a relationship...but not exactly. As I said last week, there are complications. One of which is distance. We talk everyday. We talk all day long. We snap and message and messenger and call. We joke and coo and even fight. But, the distance makes it all Just untouchable Enough.

I sometimes feel like a man without a country. There just doesn’t seem to be anything in my life to which I can tether myself.

I’m just kind of drifting at the moment. I don’t have a home, except my car. I have a place or two I can lay my head from time to time, but they are not always constant, nor reliable. One is even kind of out of the way for me. And, for obvious legal reasons, I can’t park overnight in one spot for too many nights in a row.

I truly feel so lost more often than not.

And confused.

I don’t know how to feel about things.

It’s stressful. It’s all so very stressful. I’m trying to lead a somewhat normal life - work, friends, daughters, relationship - and yet nothing about any single day seems normal.

I have to plot out the simplest things - eating, sleeping, getting dressed, going to the bathroom. I have to plan my travels and my rests.

I have no place to go and can’t stay in any one place to long.

My head is constantly spinning just trying to get a grasp on things. I don’t know what to believe in, or hope for anymore.

Yet, each day ends perfectly and I eventually realize that every day is perfect throughout.

*sigh*

Ok. So I am back to trying to blog and it is a good time for it. There is something in this story.

Something yet to be seen.

I’m going to be honest and tell you that I am cheating out in this post. I’ve been trying to write it since Friday. This is actually the second draft. I think the first one may have opened the door for a complete and total breakdown at work Friday night.

There is a lot to talk about and so many pieces of the puzzle on the table. I’m still sorting through it all really.

I think if I want to continue the blog, and on schedule, I am going to really have to start looking at ‘The Quest’ aspect of things. I need a direction in which to focus.

That seems to be a Theme in my life lately.

I’m trying to make plans, but I don’t ever really know in which direction any one thing is headed.

Will I lose my job? Will it get better? Do I need to look for another job? Do I need to look for two? Will I be leaving The Valley? If I stay, where will I be living? And how?

These are the questions and the thoughts every day.

I need to step back a moment and look at things again. Then I will return next week with, hopefully, something more for you to sink your teeth into, Faithful Readers..

So, without hesitation…

For now and for always, from here in Geistopia this is your beloved Rev…

WALT: And Walt…

JOHNNY: And Johnny…

Doc: Unt me…

And, all of those guys, wishing you Peace, Love, Light…

WALT:…and Freakishness, baby!

Please feel free to leave comments, questions, and concerns. I don’t know you are there if you don’t say, “Hi.” Also, you’re experience of WTML is just as important as mine. So, let me know what you think. Secondly, if you would like to connect, or find out more about me, you can find WTML on Facebook @TheNewWTML or myself at @rev.mgeist.

Totems:

Deer - Gentleness and Innocence - Gentle Luring to New Adventure

Turtle - Motherhood, Longevity, Awakening to Opportunities

Dragonfly - The Power of Light