The March Hare

Hey, gang! Welcome to my life – where anything is possible and nothing is as it seems. I’m Freedom and I’ll be your host, coming at you from within the depths of Geistopia.

DOC: Velcum To My Life ees a prochect, un experiment in Life unt ART. A living storyboard, if you will. Its premise ees zat life ees experiential, unt zat you can, unt do, experience ze life you choose. It ees based on Ze Veel of Life unt Ze ARTs for Ze New Millennium as life building tools. Yeah, it’s true.

WALT: Welcome to my Life is an I T.V. Studios/Geist…House Players Production, in association with the Center for Creative Inspirationalism. JustUs Productions, the parent company, would like to give a ‘Shout-Out’ to the following for their ongoing, and oft-times unknowing, inspiration and support:

Princess Cuddlebug

Princess Sunshine

Craze & Co.

The Shaman

The Pillar

F’n Bob

The Warden

The Entire Putt-Putt-Putter Clan

FaeriePrincess

Professor Siggy Chong

Hoagie Snowflake

Sparky Wentz-eclaus

The VanMan and General Ralph Glossop (may they R.I.P.)

The Messengers of The Galactic Federation

The Looch

The Bassett Hound

Bert-On

The Baker of the Cornbread

Andy Pandy

The Mudder

Zason

Oh, Danny Boy

St. Diane & You

Brother John

Thing 1 & Thing 2

The Nameless One

Good Man, Charlie Brown

‘Jim’

The Rox

CCPA

Senoll #5

Superstar

Sir Richard Slouch

The Wix-ians

The Socialite

The Village of Idiots

Piz-Niffer

Dancing Queen

Downtown Encyclopedia Brown

Baby-Mama Rabbit

My Belle

The Babes

Aaaand, of course, a very generous sponsor who (not-so-much) wishes to remain anonymous.

It is…Sunday, March 1, 2020. Time...Revolving.

Theme - Quest

This was definitely a Theme throughout my week. Each time, it came to me in a similar fashion. It was subtle - something, perhaps, another might just overlook. But, it was there and it caught my attention. More importantly, it rang true. It rang true across the board for me actually. It was a reminder to me that no matter what I am doing, I am Questing. Every day is a Quest of its own. [At one time, I wanted to write a course on daily questing.] It was also a reminder that, though things are settling a bit in my life, I am still on a Quest that began last February. But, also, it is soon time for a Quest. I can feel it. I need to escape. I need a day to ‘not be’...or…’just be,’ depending on how you want to come at it. Perhaps next Monday, after pay, and the day I see The Princesses again.

Lesson - Acknowledge [Give Thanks] for the Little Accomplishments [Blessings]

I feel like this is an often repeated message, or understanding, in my life. But, then, it is also an important one. It is very easy to get caught up in The Big Picture, or The Grand Scheme of Things. It is easy to get distracted by Goals and reaching them [or, failing to do so.] It is easy to become deluded by the notion of ‘have nots’ as opposed to the notion of ‘haves.’ For example, I am still very far from where I would like to be financially. I feel overwhelmed some days at the task before me. I feel like I just can’t get enough done to get to that Goal. Still, I must stop and take stock of just how far I have come...and, only since the first of the year. For the first time, in a very very long time, I have paid my bills, I have started catching up on some owed money, I put some money aside [albeit, not very much in the end,] I took The Princesses to dinner and for a treat, I took care of groceries and have been managing gas [despite the leaking tank]...and still I have monies left over. It is not a lot, but it is Just Enough to continue taking care of business until pay on Friday morning. It could still be tight, because I do have a bit of extra driving to do this week, but I should be able to manage it. Nonetheless, the point is, this is an accomplishment. I have reached ‘a point.’ I should be grateful for that. I should praise it just a little. This stretches into so much of my life. I know I have a long way to go yet, and I think about it every day. Still, every day, I must also take the time to acknowledge all that I have done and come through so far. I am balancing my life. I am doing just a little bit more of the things I need to do. Little by little it comes together.  [And, G-d looked upon it and it was good.]

Observation - Kick it up a Notch

I have come a long way, and I do realize that. However, as I have stated, I also have a long way to go. I have things I want to do and to accomplish. My life is very involved, and I realize that. Each area of my life brings with it its own needs and commitments. I need to make sure that I am giving enough to each every week. Lately, I don’t feel that I have. There have been reasons for this and I have been accepting of them. It has been a great adjustment these past few weeks. So, I have been patient in my shortcomings. Still, it is time to do a little more, exert a tad more effort. I just need to stay focused and determined. [Disciplined, as Johnny would say.] For example, I realized that over the course of adjusting to The Job, I stopped checking in with myself each week. I had my lists and I was definitely using them. What I wasn’t doing was taking time each week to purge them and update them. I wasn’t taking time to really look ahead at my week and the overall vibe I am trying to achieve. I need to make time for that each week. I need to make time to add in the little things. For instance, I would love to get back to reading. I haven’t enjoyed a book in a very long time. By biggest challenge is managing the off-times. I have time in my week but very often it is constrained. There are other influences and factors - such as Hoagie or the fact that we are in an apartment. There are things I can do only at certain times of day. I need to figure out how to utilize those times better, as well as how to make more of the times when it is more constrained and limited.

The Numbers

We are at the end of week 9 of The Experiment. 9 is the number of Finality. It is Completion and a Major Number of Healing.

It is also Week 5 of The Job. 5 - The Number of The Underworld. The Number of Coming into Being. 5 makes us face ourselves.

I find this combination very intriguing at the moment.

At the end of Week 3 of The Job [which you may recall was the first marker I was given] I was told to give it 3 more weeks. I immediately acknowledged the forming pattern and it was validated and confirmed. 3-6-9. 3 weeks leads to 6 weeks and then I need to give it 3 more weeks to see where things are at [across the board in my life.] This should get us to the end of the month.

Also, it seems somewhere I must have miscalculated. I recall writing previously that March 8th would be part/near the end of Week 11. Obviously, I was mistaken. [**After thought - I figured it out. I was counting the first week, of both The Job and The Experiment as Week 1. It’s not, of course. It is Week 0 - The Void. So we are soon going into Week 11 of The Experiment and Week 6 of The Job.]

The Week

I don’t really know what to say about the week at this point. It was intense and invigorating and inspiring. There were moments it lifted me up and times it broke me down. But, all in all, it was a good week. [Hell, at this point, any week I survive is a “good week.”]

I had off Monday and Tuesday, and did not go in to work until 1700 on Wednesday [though I wasn’t scheduled until 1800.] Essentially, this was the same as 3 days off to me - One to Rest, One to Quest, and One to Test. This week, it all seemed to happen a little bit each day. On Monday I had some rest, but there was also a little Quest in there. That Quest happened to be a test of its own.

On Monday, I would see The Princesses for the first time in a month. In fact, it was the same as the last time. I picked them up, we grabbed dinner at the same diner, then we stopped for a little snack and I took them home. This is the best kind of time I can get with them under the current circumstances and I will take it for all I can. I so enjoy their company. Sometimes, I wish we were a little bit more connected, but they are both [basically] teenagers and we all know what that is like. Still, I revel in these moments. In fact, Monday after dinner, they wanted to go to the park and it was nice. They hung out and I just sort of chilled and let them. Frankly, it was nice to see them spend time together like that.

Also, on Monday, I did my shopping. I finally had a decent enough paycheck. So, I set out to make my world right. I was out of food in The Dormitory. I was low on gas in The MattMobile. My supplies, across the board, were low. I needed the ingredients to make my cleaner that I use around the home and I was out of sage and sea salt and incense and candle. I re-upped the best I could. I was frugal and crafty in my purchases - enough that I was able to get a few little things [on Tuesday] that were not originally on my list. As far as groceries, I bought what I could, being as thrifty as I could and trying to have as many ‘meals’ as possible. I say ‘meals’ because some of those include something as simple as a pasta or rice side dish. I figure it is cheap enough and it is something I can make and will sere as at least one full meal, if not two. I was curious just how long the food I bought would last. The goal was to get through at least one week, because of the inconvenience of shopping. But, I was hoping to get as far through the two weeks between pays as I could - because of the inconvenience of funding. It turns out it may last me up to three weeks. First, I don’t eat much to begin with. This is something I am working on. I would like to eat more regularly and, at the same time, try to up the quality of what I am eating. The latter being the most difficult on a budget. But, also, I don’t eat much at home on days that I work. I’m usually not hungry at the end of the day. Sometimes this is because I have already eaten. More often than not though it is because I just can’t stand the sight of food. However, this week, there was an added bonus. While I was at work on Friday, ‘Jim’ would stop by to drop off a ton of food that was left over from his job. So, my food purchases may last me quite a bit longer than I had anticipated and this is good.

Tuesday, I had a list of To-Dos. [To-Do Tuesday. I like it.] I wanted to stop and pick up new sage as well as a new stone bag. I needed to get laundry done and I needed to pick up some forgotten things at the dollar store as well as new sea salt. I went to get this done as early in the day that I could so that I could attend that day’s Safety Meeting and then come straight home. Very often I don’t get to the laundry until after the Safety Meeting and I just wasn’t up for that on Tuesday.

The Safety Meeting was as Safety Meetings are. The Professor was a little disturbed by my tracking of Safety Meeting time. He was almost offended. He felt that I was suggesting that Safety Meetings are frivolous and unnecessary. Quite the opposite actually. Others may find them to be that, but I stress once more, it is at a Safety Meeting that the real business of the ‘Union’ takes place. Plans are made, deals are forged, monies are sometimes exchanged. It is at Safety Meetings that I have learned many things about many crafts and I use that knowledge to this day. Safety Meetings are also good for emotional and spiritual uplifting. Of course, a Safety meeting is like a Quest all its own. You never know what is going to happen or how the world will shift. So, once again on Tuesday, there was a bit of resting and a bit of Questing. I even took the time to test different approaches to my chores and obligations.

Wednesday would find me needing to go and submit a urine sample for work. I did this as early in the morning as was possible. This was sort of a Quest and an adventure all its own. They would call me to come in early to work that night. I didn’t go in as early as they really wanted but I got there earlier than I was scheduled. I, literally, met them half way on the matter. That begins my work week and there really isn’t much to report on that front.

The Job is as jobs tend to be. I show up. I work. I go home. Sometimes there is drama and stress. Sometimes we laugh and play around a bit. There are a couple of wrenches in the system. My back is one of them. I have been having troubles since my first week and, try as I might, I just can’t seem to quite get it worked out. I feel like I make some progress each week. But there also seems to be different kinds of discomfort each week as well, so I am not necessarily winning the war...only some of the battles. His has caused me to go home early a few times. It usually comes towards the weekend, which is the end of my week. It’s not usually a great deal of time. In fact, I am averaging 39 hours per week for my five weeks there. [38.9] This isn’t so bad considering the very first week I lost 5 hours at the end of the week because of the problems.

I am slowly working through this, doing what I can as I think of it. This week I started wearing my back brace to work. I figured, because of its design, if it did nothing else, it would at least help keep my back aligned. It has helped. I did not have near the discomfort this week that I have in past weeks. Though the rest of my body is tensing up fairly easily these days. I have been soaking in hot baths several times a week and taking good hot showers as often as I can. I’ve started drinking water, which is something I am not very good at in the first place. This coming week, I think I would like to add some stretching to my daily regimen. The biggest factor right now is not having the proper shoes. Hopefully, they will come soon.

The other issue is this punk kid. I’ve mentioned him before. He has been giving me the stink eye since Day 1. And, since that time, he has toyed with me at work. [Or, so he thinks.] I’ve taken it in stride. It’s irritating, but in a ‘peaty gnat’ kind of way. It doesn’t really bother me. It’s just annoying and I want to swat him sometimes. However, this week, he started to mess with my actual job. Nothing major...yet. I won’t get into the details. Just know that tomorrow morning I am going in to speak with the restaurant manager. I am going to tell him how things actually went down and I am going to inform him that this is his one and only chance to stop it before it escalates. Because, if it escalates, then I will put an end to it...and, I fear, all three of us will find ourselves in unhappy and unfortunate situations at that point. I will tolerate and put up with many things. Do NOT mess with my children, nor my job. I won’t play nice.

Once the work week begins, that is pretty much all there is until the end of the day on Sunday. Then, my life starts up once more. Today, The Professor was trying to get me to attend another Safety Meeting. I do not really like to do anything after work on a Sunday. I am tired and beaten and worn out and I just want to rest. The last thing I wanted to do was to make a drive and hang out. This has nothing to do with anything other than I was just spent.

However, it seems there were other reasons. Conflicting notions of the Universal Mind. I did not go out to a Safety Meeting, yet I did not get my ret and a Safety Meeting was held - Bethlehem Chapter. ‘Jim’ would stop by once more. As usual with these impromptu visits, his spirit was very fired up. I do enjoy our visits with ‘Jim.’ He lightens my own spirit when he is vibrant like he was tonight. We talk and we laugh and life is good. Still, I wasn’t really up for that today. In fact, because of it, I find myself sitting here at 0200 on Monday morning trying to finish this post.

There were several other things sprinkled throughout my week.

I posted a video in which I talked about this ‘vibe’ in the air. It seemed everyone was sensing it, or experiencing it, in their own way, yet no one could quite put their finger on it, nor define it. I think it is a good thing. I think it is global/universal. People seem to be going through great healing shifts. In fact, I have found a Theme between Hoagie and Wisconsin and myself of making peace with old hurts, putting the past in the past and redefining the future.

There was the series of email communications with Big ‘D.’ It all started with my attempt to reach out, once more, for some sort of connection and reconciliation. She did send a response and then later a ‘Thank You’ email for the gifts from The List. The first email was not quite what I was hoping for and left me feeling a little hurt nad frustrated. It wasn’t a bad email, it just didn’t quite get where I was hoping we could go. Unfortunately, I read the emails in the order they were received. So, when I responded to the thank you email I was short. My attitude was pretty much like, “Whatever.”

Later in the day, Looch would point out to me that perhaps she was trying to be vulnerable, trying to be open, trying to connect - in her own comfortable way. I was grateful for this perspective. I had hopes and expectations. Just because she did not meet them, did not mean she wasn't genuine in her efforts. I sent another email explaining myself. I explained, in greater detail, how the gifts really came to be, how they were just on The List. But, I also explained my feelings towards things. My mother and I have had our problems and difficulties for as long as I can remember. Those are not so much my concern at this point. I am more concerned that she can accept my life for what it is. Because it is what it is what it is what it is.

The major emails can be found on this blog. I didn’t include my short one. It was only two sentences anyway. But, go back and read them. Fellow Travelers. Discern for yourselves.

Also, there has been no further response. I explained where I was at and what I was needing. Her lack of a response to this is, to me, just as good as a negative response. I think it’s sad. One day I will probably write it all out. But, in the meantime, it is just sad that this is the best relationship we can have [or not] with each other.

Then there was Wisconsin. As you may recall, we officially broke up a couple of weeks ago. We came to the conclusion [well she did] that we had moved more towards a best friend relationship and that that was ok and we should nurture that. This week, she told me that she has ‘sort of’ met someone. He has asked her out, but she has yet to accept. I do not know how much they have talked. We did not get into that kind of detail. But, she was worried hat I would be hurt or angry or upset. I won’t deny that there is a level of hurt, a certain bit of sadness, that goes with it. But, she has so much love to give. She deserves to have someone in her life whom she can actually give it to and who can give it back to her. The distance just makes this too difficult for us. I want her to be happy and healthy and healing. She deserves that and so much more. She truly is an incredible soul with so much to offer the world.

Speaking of Wisconsin...take a peek at her new blog…

https://pbj714.com

So far, I enjoy her approach to it all.

As for the week ahead -

I have Monday through Wednesday off this week. I have an opportunity to do some work at The College and make a little extra money. [Finally, the moment I have been waiting for.] I do want to step things up this week and see if I can manage these ‘off hours’ a little better. I have the usual whatnots to attend to, such as laundry and cleaning. I have some tasks and projects I would like to work on and maybe even accomplish something. And, on Tuesday night, I need to take Sunshine to an event for school. It is going to press me a bit financially, only because of the gas consumed. [I really need to figure out how to get this gas tank replaced - sooner rather than later.]

If you’re not already there go to the Welcome to my Life Facebook page - WTML, or the YouTube Channel - Welcome to my Life.

Wherever you are, and whenever you are, Like, Comment and Share. Let us know you’re there.

So, without hesitation…

For now and for always, from here in Geistopia, this is your beloved Rev…

WALT: And Walt…

DOC: Unt Doc…

JOHNNY: Aaaand Johnny…

And, those guys, saying, “stay tuned in Fellow Travellers,” and wishing you Peace, Love, Light…

WALT: ...and freakishness, baby!!

TOTEMS:

**from Ted Andrews’ Animal Speak**

I need to comment that the Hawk has been a regular occurance of late. More so than any other time in my journey. It is not just the frequency of appearance - but the when and how as well. Very often they appear in pairs or trios. I have seen this before, but it is not generally this common. They appear right on time in conjunction with certain thoughts. I am also, more often, sensing their presence before I see them.

Hawk - Visionary Power and Guardianship.

Messengers, protectors and visionaries. Visionary power and leading you to your life purpose. There is a message coming. What you eat, you become. Kundalini. Childhood visions are becoming empowered and fulfilled. The ability to soar and glide upon the currents. Great Heights while still keeping your feet on the ground. Attacks by people who won’t understand you - attack your ability to soar. Teaching of higher expression of psychosis and vision. Beauty and harmony in moderation. Lead you to using your creative energy in manifesting your soul purpose. Hope and new ideas. A need to be open to the new or shows ways that you may help teach others to be open to the new. Be observant. Life is sending signals. Careful in expression. Comments and actions will be strong and powerful with the ability to tear and/or kill.

Heron - Aggressive Self-Determination and Self-Reliance.

Symbols of balance and they represent the ability to progress and evolve. The deeper life can be explored. You don’t need great massive pillars to remain stable, but you must be able to stand on your own. A connection to the earth - while implying the exploration of other dimensions on the earth. Explore various activities and dimensions of earth life. This may seem a form of dabbling, but Heron people are wonderfully successful at being the traditional ‘Jack of all trades.’ Enables them to follow their own path. Most people will never be able to live the way Heron people do. It is not a structured way and does not seem to have stability and security to it. It is, though, a matter of perception. It gives the ability to do a variety of tasks. If one way doesn’t work another will. Do not seem to need a lot of people n their lives and do not feel pressure to ‘kee up with the Joneses,’ or be traditional in their life roles. Stand out in their uniqueness and they know how to snatch and take advantage of things and events the average person would not bother with.